What’s Really Holding Us Back?

Comments (0) Fitness Over 40, June 2018 KW Magazine

Each month I hear from and work with a lot of people who desperately want to make big changes in their lives.  They want to lose weight, start exercising, get fit, feel better about themselves.  Sometimes they have high cholesterol, blood pressure, or have become pre-diabetic and they realize that they have reached that proverbial line in the sand.   So many of us have reached that point at one time or another, right?

People will reach out and ask for help, explain their struggles, and work with me to craft a plan.  That’s what I love most about being a fitness coach.  Helping people find a path that will work for them and encouraging them along the way.  I want so badly for everyone to be successful and to meet their goals.

Most people who decide to go for it will make a lot of positive changes in their lives.  They will lose weight or improve their level of fitness, feel great about themselves in the process, and go on to make lasting lifestyle changes.  Unfortunately, a portion of the people who start each month with big goals and clear plans don’t actually succeed, or at least not right away.  They stop answering my messages, they stop checking in with the accountability group, and I see lots of social media posts about how busy they are and all their stops at the drive-thru.  When we finally connect they tell me that it just wasn’t their month, or they had too much going on, or it just wasn’t going to work for them.  I get it, but it makes me so sad because I know they are feeling frustrated and discouraged.

Here is a little secret that I’ll let you in on.  I can almost always predict who is going to knock it out of the park and rock their fitness program, stick to their nutrition plan, start seeing results quickly and feel great about it.  I can also usually predict which people are going to disappear on me and give up on their workouts after a few days when they feel sore and tired and they face that first tough temptation.

What’s almost magical is that there is only one thing that separates these 2 categories of people.  It’s not genetics, or innate athleticism, or how much free time you have.  It isn’t whether you’ve had kids, or you have a thyroid issue, or how old you are.  It all boils down to MINDSET.  That’s it, and the beauty of it is that mindset is something you are completely in control of.  You and only YOU.

Here are some of the things I hear that tip me off when I’m working with someone who going to knock it out of the park:

– I’m ready, I’m all in, and I’m excited to do this.

– I’m doing this for me and no one else.

– Just tell me what to do and I’ll do it, I’m ready to have a plan to follow.

– I know it’s going to be hard, but that won’t stop me.

– I’ll do anything it takes.

– My family knows what I’m doing and they are supportive.

– I know it will take time, but I won’t give up.

– I had a little setback but I got right back on track.

– I am so proud of myself for making the decision to start.

Here are some of the things I hear from the people who are not immediately successful:

– I want to do this but I’m not sure I can.

– I always start something new but never finish it.

– I don’t really like exercise, but I’ll try.

– Can I just do the workouts but not follow the nutrition?

– I only have time to do my workout 3-4 times a week.

– I just don’t know how I’m going to fit this in.

– I didn’t tell anyone what I was doing because it never works.

– I slipped up over the weekend so I just threw in the towel.

Can you tell the difference just from reading that list?  The people who are successful go into it expecting to succeed.  They are ready, they are excited, and they have DECIDED that they are going to go all in and give it 100%.  They aren’t making excuses, they aren’t talking themselves out of it, and they aren’t scared of failing.  They are going to change their lives one day at a time and one healthy decision at a time.

The people who aren’t quite ready yet have a very different attitude.  They are already assuming the worst.  They are expecting failure because that’s what they have experienced in the past.  They are already thinking of excuses and they are trying to buffer themselves from disappointment.  They aren’t ready to put in the hard work.   Their mindset just isn’t there yet, but it can be!

Whenever you are thinking about making a big change in your life you have to be ready.  No one can do it for you.  You have to decide that you’ve reached your breaking point and that you are committed to doing what it takes.  You have to go into it with your eyes wide open.  You have to be committed to making hard decisions and sacrifices.  Most importantly you have to be doing it for YOU.

Truly changing your health and fitness is not an easy decision, and it’s not an easy process either.  A positive mindset can go a long way in helping you to be successful.  In fact, it’s critical.  We are all more than capable of doing these things and changing the course of our lives completely.  It just takes a little bit of courage, determination, and a whole lot of patience and positivity.  Start working on that mindset now and you’ll have already won half the battle.  Remind yourself that you absolutely deserve to be happy and healthy and to feel comfortable in your own skin.  When you’re ready, dive in and make those changes.  You’ll be so proud of yourself when you succeed!

Hadley SorensenHadley Sorensen is a health and fitness coach who lives in Virginia with her husband and 3 boys. She is an avid reader, runner and fitness instructor who has a passion for helping others learn to enjoy exercise. Hadley  uses one-on-one coaching as well as virtual accountability groups to provide support and motivation to her clients. Her guiding philosophy is that it’s never too late to take charge of your health and improve your level of fitness. Find her on Facebook @HadleySorensenFitness

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