Are Parasites Sucking the Blood Out of Your Business?

Comments (0) Business, Education, Entrepreneurs, Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

I recently read an article on small businesses and what stops them from being successful – half way through it hit me…These problems could be described as parasites – things you don’t even realize are killing your business. Little by little they waste your time and keep you from doing the things that actually make you the success you deserve to be.


Parasite # 1- Demanding Client(s)…

If you are a business that values your customer – you give great customer service – you bend over backwards to do everything possible to make them happy and give them an experience that will bring them back for more.

In fact 99% of my business, in the past 5 years, have been repeat customers and referrals.

I am proud of that.

Even so, that doesn’t mean along the way I have not run into what I call the demanding client.

When I was a young company, I was just happy to have anyone that needed my services. I didn’t care how difficult or time consuming they were. I would do the design project as we had discussed, but then suddenly, they were not happy with something we had been developing for weeks – thing that were great last week needed to be changed.

Now you may be thinking that is great – more hours more money – NOT!

I work on a per project basis, my clients are mainly small businesses or start up companies that could not afford me if I were to charge per hours, so we have an agreed upon project price. Looking at this scenario you can see that I was working for less than minimum wage – the more time I would give the more they would demand. I realized after having a few of these types of clients I had not communicated with them effectively. I didn’t have a written – contract that explained in detail what I would do for a given amount.

Lesson learned I started to set boundaries and write contracts that were much more detailed.

The communication got better and the clients knew what to expect and things ran along much smoother. Happy customers – even happier business owner

Parasite # 2 – Unreasonable Client(s)…

My motto,

Under promise – Over Deliver

How many of us have seen or heard the ads – make 20 billion dollars in 3 hours – solve all your problems in life with just 3 easy steps…. You get my point, if it sounds too good to be true – it is.

I always try and give my clients 110% – I will not nickel and dime them to death. I will help them with marketing advice if they need it etc.

However, ever once in a while I have a client that will not adhere to our contract.

They are just plain difficult – expect the impossible, and I found myself in the difficult position of having to say things like – we didn’t agree on that, or look at the proposal we outlined, or (fill in the blanks)…

What do you do when this happens to you?

Be up front, if you feel it is not worth your time – refund the money and move on – or refund a portion of their money (if it is for a service rendered) and quit doing business with them.

It is not worth the time when you have someone who does not respect you or your business – and if you cannot find a solution cut your losses. Do not continue to hit your head against the wall – you are losing business with people who want what you have to offer because you are trying to do the impossible.

Important point:

First of all, I hope you have structured your business so you take a deposit for services rendered. I personally have my client’s pay 50% up front and 50% upon completion.

If it is a huge project, I will take 50% up front, 25% once we have an agreed upon design – and 25% upon completion.

This protects my clients from worry because they know if I don’t live up to my promises, I will not get a full payment – it protects me because I know they are serious and have paid me a portion of the agreed upon fee.

Luckily, I don’t have clients like this anymore. I can tell by the initial consultation if it is a client I want to work with.

Don’t be afraid to turn down a client if you find they are not a fit – you will benefit in the long run and so will they.

Parasite #3 – Time Wasters…

You’re a business owner that is trying to be frugal. Times are a bit tight so you think you need to do everything yourself.

Even when you don’t have the slightest idea how to do it…

After all you are smart – why not learn how to do a website – design your own marketing material – and keep the books?


Seriously, stick to what you do well – don’t waste your time trying to learn things that should be done by someone who knows how to do it right and in a fraction of the time. You don’t need to hire the most expensive person, just a professional who knows how.

The time it takes you to learn how to do these things – could be time you are spending finding clients, marketing, networking doing what you do well.

The old adage is true, time is money. So don’t waste your time learning to do something that should be left to professionals.

In fact you may even do more harm than good to your business. An example may be something like putting up a website that is less then professional and portraying a poor image.

Or not hiring a CPA to do your taxes when you know nothing about what exemptions you can take for a business – so you end up actually losing out on tax exemptions simply because you have no clue about financial matters.

In my case I am not a programmer – I can do some minor programming – and I know where to get java scripts I can use etc. But I hate the heavy duty stuff – and it would take me forever to learn something I am not talented at and I do not like.

If I have a client that needs something I cannot do I hire it done by a professional – and I outsource it.

I know it will cost me a lot less to have it done by a programmer because it will take them a fraction of the time – and they know more than I will ever care to know. On top of that, it will cost my client a lot less because I will not spend hours trying to figure it out.


The bottom line is – it is important to recognize time wasters when you run your own business.

A lot of things (you may not even realize) can waste your time and pull you under making your business less than successful – and in time drain you of the enthusiasm and excitement you had when you first started the dream of developing your own financial security.

The thrill of developing a business from scratch and seeing it come to fruition is amazingly satisfying and to be able to learn from others will put you on the fast track to success…

Just remember that nothing good comes easy – but everything good will come when enjoying the fruits of your labor!

Pamela Jacob  owner of Artista Design

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I thought it was a good idea… What do I do now?

Comments (0) Business, Education, Entrepreneurs

I am always getting e-mail from business owners who, in their crunch for time have opted to conveniently go to a host/web design/web development/domain registrar all rolled into one…

Not a good Idea!

Let me tell you why, this is just my view, but it is an educated one. I have dealt with many, many business owners who have been burned. They now have to deal with the difficulties of redoing mistakes that didn’t have to occur in the first place.

Many business owners who are brilliant at what they do are also clueless when it comes to the Internet and all the things that must be done to develop a website, register a domain name and host that website.

On the other hand, they may know enough but want the convenience of a one stop shop, so they can be free to operate their business. (more…)

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Do You Have a Custom Website?

Comments (0) Business, Education, Entrepreneurs

There are some huge misconceptions out there. People who are smart and savvy when it comes to business really don’t know the difference between websites, customized websites, and custom websites. I must admit a lot of web people, and websites play fast and loose with the terms but there is a big difference between each of them. You really have to ask questions when you have someone do a website for you.

It seems everyone is saying they do custom websites – but do they? What is the difference? (more…)

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White Lies = Red Flags

Comments (2) Boomer Life, Online Dating, Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

Men assume that I am older than the age I have posted on my online dating profile. At least, that’s the discouraging news that one man passed along to me when we met for a glass of wine.

Apparently, so many men and women lie about their age online, that it is commonly assumed that you are “fudging”. I’ve been told that many viewers automatically add at least several years onto your age, or maybe just round up to the next milestone. Does my 56 get rounded up to 60?

I recently read a males profile that stated his age as 61. When I got to the end of his self-description, he had a disclaimer that said his age was a few years older than what he had stated.

Since he wanted to meet, I responded by asking him if it was only a few years, why would he bother to be deceptive, and how was his strategy working for him?

He responded that he was actually 71, and that his caveat was working quite well. He boasted that he actually had received compliments for admitting that he hadn’t stated his true age.

That made me feel a bit annoyed. Women were praising him for being truthful about his deceitfulness! I wasn’t impressed when he told me he had dated many women younger than me, and I didn’t meet him.

From the research I have done personally and through online blogs and articles, I believe that the two most common lies that men tell are about their age and their height. Men tend to add two inches to their height and to deduct as much as ten years or more from their age.

They also try to be deceptive about their hair, or lack of it. I have seen men’s profiles with numerous photos of them in different settings, but always wearing a baseball cap.

I read an article that claimed that men lie online more than women, but women are certainly doing their fair share of deception. Nearly every man I have met has told me about at least one frustrating date with a woman who was obviously older (sometimes much older) than she said she was.

Maybe the most shocking story I have heard is of the woman who actually ‘fessed up (after being confronted by her disgruntled date), that she had posted photos of her daughter!

After the “age deception complaint”, the second most common beef I have heard from men is about women representing themselves as thinner than they actually are. Every guy seems to have a story about the woman who listed herself as “about average”, who in reality was very overweight, or even obese.

One tactic overweight women employ is to only have headshots posted. Another strategy is to post flattering photos from thinner days gone by, which means the photo is also of a younger woman.

Hearing about those tactics always makes me curious how women think they are going to pull that off in person? I ask the same question about how men think they are going to hide their lack of hair? Maybe they will suggest meeting at a sports bar so they can wear their baseball cap.

I had a man tell me that he didn’t feel good about it, but he actually had turned around and headed for his car when he saw his date waiting for him. In his opinion, she was overweight. Does that make him a jerk, or is it fair if she had misrepresented herself?

I would rather stay at home than have a disappointed date. I can hope that he will want to get to know me and discover how wonderful I am; but the problem is, if I deceived him to get him there, then I am not what he expected. That’s a shaky start.

Gregory Hartley, former military interrogator and co-author of How To Spot A Liar: Why People Don’t Tell the Truth? and How You Can Catch Them says, “We are working in an area that is new to most people. The world’s oldest game on the world’s newest field. The Internet dating scene is about filtering among the vast numbers for an opportunity. It is about evolution. It is both very primitive and very modern.”

Is there harm in telling a few teensy white lies when you are looking for a new relationship? What’s a couple of pounds, a few inches, or even a marriage or two?

Hartley says, “This depends on the lie; sure we all omit facts about our past. I am no advocate of radical truth. Do you really want someone to come out and tell you how many people they have slept with?”

Hartley warns, “In my mind, a lie at the beginning of a relationship is asking for trouble later. No lie can stand alone. To sustain a lie you must tell other lies. Before you know it, deception is rampant.”

“Which means those harmless little white lies are more harmful than we thought. Can pretending to be something you’re not quite be keeping you from finding a real relationship? If you are one of two people offering up their fake selves, how can you possibly meet your true soul mate? You can’t.”

What seems blatantly obvious to me, is that beside the fact that someone has offered you a false self, how do you ever really trust someone that you know lied to you right out of the gate?

I’ve heard people make light of this behavior with the comment “everyone does it”. Actually, I don’t believe that’s true, “everyone” doesn’t lie and there are plenty of people who want to start a relationship with an honest foundation.

“I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you.” Friedrich Nietzsche

Cheryl Alexandra Michaels, CPC, CSC is a Certified Professional Coach and Spiritual Coach.  She is a Reiki Master, an Angel Therapy™ Practitioner and a Reconnective Healing™ Practitioner.  She lives in the suburbs of Seattle, Washington.


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Three Tips To Effectively Navigate Frustration

Comments (0) Entrepreneurs, Holistic Living/Life

© Guo Yi |

It seems to be up in the air and around people I speak lately, the sense that there is irritation, a feeling of being on the edge, frustration and yet, hope and optimism for the changes underway.

To a certain degree, irritation can be the result of uncertainty and mis-communication.  Especially if you are a perfectionist like I tend to be (getting better as time goes on!), when things don’t go the way you planned or the way you want them to, you may get frustrated because of losing control of the situation.

There is also a heavy astrological influence these days and with Mars in Virgo for the next few months we are learning how to harness our energy for moving forward, our strength and courage, our assertion or lack there-of, while staying grounded and methodical about our pursuits. On the flip side for those of us in the perfectionist camp, this can create heavier friction and self-criticism as Virgo tends to focus on the minute details and loose grasp of the bigger picture when under stress.

Here are three tips you can use when you feel frustrated:

1)      Take a breath before you speak; pinch yourself if you need to so as to energetically shift your perception.

2)      Be patient! Remember that not everyone thinks nor responds the way you do. If you feel your point has not made its way across, take a breath and re-introduce it.

3)      Note your self-talk; I will not clarify here between positive and negative as I trust that if you do praise yourself throughout the day for what you do and how you think, you will continue doing so!.

However, if you catch yourself in “beating-up” mode for a decision you made or for a course of action you committed or not to, pause. This is the voice of the perfectionist within where there is no room for mistakes.

Please consider how you can handle the situation that triggers you in a different way; there is always a different way and you have to allow room for it to emerge.

About the author: Liliane Mavridara is a published author, poet, mentor and creative groupwork facilitator who supports holistic practitioners and coaches to build their expert status through blog and book writing.

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Design vs Content

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

OK… So the debate rages on. One type of person believes the design is not important it is the content that makes the difference..

Then the other type of person thinks the design is all that is important – the content is secondary. I hear it all the time and it…

Drives Me Crazy!!

Being an artist at heart I am very visual and so design is absolutely essential.

Being a business woman my clients and website visitors are important to me and I believe that content of the site and the information you give your clients is also absolutely essential.

Being a successful entrepreneur I know that design – image – content – navigation – uniqueness – credibility – great customer service – sharing your knowledge with others is absolutely essential to have a thriving – successful online-business (or even brick and mortar business).

So lets just look at it all … If you want true success and a great business you need it all…

In fact the foundation needs to be built before you even begin building a website. This will be the foundation of your success.

  1. Who is your perfect client? (The answer is not everybody!)
  2. What make you different from the competition?
  3. What color would attract that type of client?
  4. What content will give you client the most value?
  5. What will bring on-line visitors back and turn them into clients?
  6. What type of navigation will be best to get my visitors information they need without having to search?

The list goes on…when you take care of the foundation and make it strong; the rest will fall into place.

The design of your website must be professional and polished,

When you cut corners and you think you are saving money think again! Doing it right the first time just makes sense.

IF you want a thriving business with results then content, design and marketing work together, leaving out any of these elements will not bring you the amazing success you deserve!
To your success – and bottom line!

Pamela Jacob – Artista Design

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They Say It Is Free! Really?

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

I don’t know how many of you feel the way I do but when I hear the word FREE I expect it to be free…

I cannot tell you how many times I will get an email – the subject line catches my interest, so I read further, I see that they have a FREE offer.

It looks great, and is something I am interested in. I click on the link and fill out the form only to find that it isn’t free at all, “you may use these tools for a limited time only or must pay shipping and handling” and by the way, shipping and handling is usually much more than it would cost to send.

There is nothing wrong with limited time offers or getting something for just the shipping and handling but put it up in front, be honest!! I will more than likely still be interested in what you have to offer – I don’t need to be tricked into signing on the dotted line!!

If you are a company that has been using this tactic, think again. As a possible client I have to tell you it leaves a bad taste in my mouth, and I am sure I am not alone. When this happens, I feel that I have been led down the wrong path, and I cannot trust the business that has sent me the offer.

Upon reading a piece of email like this, I will immediately put the company name and email on my spam list, to be banished forever (a little dramatic but true.)

I have an extremely busy schedule (as do all of you), and I do not have time to read email and take action, unless I am truly interested.

Remember: Perception is everything and you do not want to leave the wrong perception. If you are currently planning a marketing campaign, please heed my warning; be upfront and honest – no gimmicks please!

When you have gone through the time and trouble to put together a marketing campaign – be up front with what you are actually offering. Ethics and honesty are one of the most important things that a business must hold true to, or they will not build a lasting clientèle base.

Without it your business will not flourish and grow, it will eventually wither and die…

Pamela Jacob – Artista Design Providing Creative Solutions and Valuable Results TM

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2012 The Financial Action Plan

Comments (0) Finance and Money

First and foremost – it’s important to start by patting yourself on the back if you managed to weather 2011 with its crazy market swings, record breaking natural disasters, political grid lock in Washington, DC and a near collapse of the Euro Zone. Oh, let’s not forget China and the Asian continent’s continued strive to grow their middle class and most importantly, the Arab Spring throughout the middle east. Yes 2011 was a whopper of a year and I am quite sure 2012 will not be any less stressful or eventful.

So how does one begin 2012?

Financial action plan, of course.

A sound financial plan is based on many factors all of which are important and need to be reviewed consistently and coordinated on an on-going base. Therefore, I strongly recommend that you make time to sit with your financial advisor or wealth consultant and review your finances on an all-in approach. Leave nothing off the table. Discuss every topic however mundane it may seem. Ultimately a sound plan that is visited and actively managed may lead to a less stressful year ahead.

Stock and bonds? When discussing your portfolio here are a few ideas I would pass on.

In a market likely to produce only modest gains, diversifying your fixed-income holdings and focusing on relatively stable equities, is a strategy I recommend you actively discuss in 2012.

Hold the Big Dependable – According to common economic knowledge, early on in a recovery cycle, small company stocks historically give you the biggest pop. However, at this stage of our recovery, it’s the big-boys with balance sheet “might” that are likely to outperform in 2012. These large companies have a far larger exposure to foreign markets and a greater potential for profitability. However, their bigger dividend can account for a larger portion of your gains in a low return universe this coming year.

Bet on high yield On the flip side of the investment spectrum we have bonds. As the recession fears rose in 2011, economically sensitive high-yield bonds sold off big time. This caused a reduction in the price of existing high yield bonds thereby pushing their yields up to records highs. At the same time the flight to safety meant that short-term treasuries jumped up in price by almost 9% according to Barclays US aggregate Bond index in early 2011 driving their yields down to barely a positive number. Since the high yield bond products tend to bounce around, keeping a modest allocation perhaps in the 5 to 10 percent range.

As mentioned before, treasuries won’t default or bounce around as much as high-yields, but are at risk if rates rise. Treasuries maturing in five to eight years are paying barely more than cash, so it makes little sense to buy them at this point. A “bar bell” approach makes a lot more sense such as approximately 80% of the treasuries to be short-term securities and 20% in long-term bonds. In fact the Fed’s campaign to buy long term bonds known as Operation Twist, should make long term bonds less risky. Since this strategy with today’s numbers should yield about 2.5% yield, it’s almost one percentage point greater than the seven year treasury. Again discuss this with your advisor to make sure this allocation is sufficient to give your portfolio some exposure to the asset class.

Over all the markets may very well continue to swing wildly back and forth right up to the election all the while keeping a closer eye on Europe’s financial woes. You will need to remain vigilant and proactive with your plan but most importantly, focused on the long term goal versus day to day numbers.

Good luck out there.

Ronit Rogoszinski, CFP®, is a graduate of Citibank’s elite management program who became one of the youngest mangers in the bank’s New York region in 1990. Shortly after, she became a licensed Financial Advisor for Citicorp Investment Services, an achievement which launched her current successful career. Ronit heads up our New York office where helping both individuals and business owners gain control of their finances has been her primary goal. Ronit Rogoszinski has always been on a personal and professional quest to demystify personal finance, money management and investing for individuals and business owners. She has presented at many seminars in addition to holding one on one consultation to help clients better understand their finances and get closer to achieving their financial goals through specific recommendations and advice.

There is no guarantee that a diversified portfolio will enhance overall returns or outperform a non-diversified portfolio. Diversification does not protect against market risk. The prices of small cap stocks are generally more volatile than large cap stocks. There is no guarantee that a diversified portfolio will enhance overall returns or outperform a non-diversified portfolio. Diversification does not protect against market risk. High yield/junk bonds(grade BB or below) are not investment grade securities, and are subject to higher interest rate, credit, and liquidity risks than those graded BBB and above. They generally should be part of a diversified portfolio for sophisticated investors.

The economic forecasts set forth may not develop as predicted and there can be no guarantee that strategies promoted will be successful.

Securities and Financial Planning offered through LPL Financial, a registered investment Advisor. Member FINRA/SIPC

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Five Tips For Grounding The New Year

Comments (0) Entrepreneurs, Holistic Living/Life

GREAT BLUE HERON © Robert Roach |

Even though we have already been in 2012 for over a week now, it has taken me as long to find my whereabouts, to establish a clear picture of what I would like to do different this year.

On New Year’s Day I have a ritual of, among other things, doing a dreamboard that encapsulates both the intention I am putting forth for the year and the energies available to me, whether I am consciously aware of them at the time or not.  This year portrays a lot of assertion, independence, love, playfulness and less control, as far as my spontaneous nature goes.

Here are five tips I’d like to share that may ground in a practical way your wishes and aspirations for this year:

1) First of all, please keep in mind that it is your year, thus reflect on what it is you would like to have, do, accomplish not only in your business but also in your personal life, romantic or other, and your social endeavors. Visualize the big picture without focusing on the details.

2) What are the feelings you would like to experience? I.e. fulfillment, being in-love, inspired? Pick three that stand out.

3) How would you like to be perceived in your professional endeavors? I.e. knowledgeable, resourceful, good listener? Pick three.

4) Which area would you like to be emphasized in your life? I.e. is it in the romantic arena, your income, personal development, health regime? Prioritize.

5) Lastly, how will you have fun? Write down three things you love (or would love to do) i.e. taking a zumba class, writing, painting, horseback riding.

If you are visual, create something that captures what you have noted, and if you like writing things down or prefer lists, then put together in a meaningful way what you have noted.  Keep the whole process simple and enjoyable, and place your creation where you can refer to it as often as possible.

About the author: Liliane Mavridara is a published author, poet, writing mentor and creative groupwork facilitator who supports entrepreneurs in the healing and creative arts to have a successful business and a harmonious lifestyle while making a big difference.

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Do You Know Betty?

Comments (1) Business, Entrepreneurs

Years ago, I watched the Dr. Phil McGraw show and he said “If you are going to sell things that Betty buys, you better see life through Betty’s eyes.”  I never forgot it and if you’re in business, neither should you.

Researchers Colleen Butler and Paul Chinowsky identified the interpersonal skill of empathy as one of five key emotional intelligent behaviors that need additional attention during the development of executives. To be empathetic is to understand the emotions of others; to walk in another person’s shoes.

To continually grow your business, you must seek to understand the needs of your customers and see life through their eyes. If you were sitting on the other side of that desk what would you want to hear?  You would want to hear the benefit of the product or service, what sets it apart from its competition and its value to your organization. Abraham Lincoln said, “When I get ready to talk to people, I spend two thirds of the time thinking about what they want to hear and one third of the time thinking about what I want to say.” Based on your customers’ needs, challenges and products, what do you think they want to hear?

Before you show up for your next business meeting take time to research who the client is, what they do and how you can service them.  Whatever you do, don’t focus on problems, have a solutions focused mindset on how you can help your clients achieve their goals.

Coaching psychologists Dianne Stober and Anthony Grant found that having a solutions focused mindset enables people to access and use the wealth of personal experience, skills, expertise and intuition that resides within all of us. With that mindset, determine the goal of the meeting and what action you want to happen. A goal expressed plants a seed in your client’s mind and with the right action plan can grow. Action planning is the process of developing a systematic means of attaining goals.  This is extremely important let me tell you why.

When you show up with a goal and action plan, the conversation has structure like a good speech, it has a beginning, middle and end. You are not floundering; you know what you want from the client and the action needed to get it. Your client may not know the action needed. It is not their responsibility to know how to get you what you want but with a goal and plan, they are more likely to discover during the course of conversation ways in which they can be of assistance. The best goals will fall by the wayside without a concrete plan of action. You should create mind mapping exercises at your office based on mock client responses. This gives you direction and ideas on what you can say to keep the conversation flowing towards the goal.

Finally, be your authentic self; No one likes someone who comes off as disingenuous or fake. It’s bad, bad business. High-performing salespersons are significantly more self-aware and authentic (which is a function of emotional intelligence) than low-performers. On the day of your meeting show up wearing confidence and have points in your discussion that excite you, points that you are passionate about and let that enthusiasm shine through. Deliver your ideas with commitment and passion and remember to remind your face that you are excited about what your team can bring to the table. The conversation should have rhythm let your voice rise and fall throughout your presentation so the conversation doesn’t come off flat, monotone and emotionless.  Make direct eye contact, smile and ask for their business. Before you leave the meeting ask the client if there are any next steps, anything you can do to make their decision easier. After that, you can leave knowing you arrived prepared, seeing life through Betty’s eyes.

By: Dickie Sykes

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7 tips to survive the holiday craze

Comments (0) Entrepreneurs, Holistic Living/Life

I was recently in a conversation where a colleague was inquiring on suggestions to “survive” the holidays.  Being on my own and traveling over the last couple of years, I am glad not having to participate in the whole frenzy of gift shopping.  However, I do notice that my friends and others around me seem exhausted and in a “when will this be over” attitude, while traffic and impatience are prevalent wherever I go.

So, whether you are on your own and are in complete control of the holiday events or whether you run around until the last minute to catch up with everything, here are a few tips I have found may ease the stress and help you actually enjoy the beautiful moments of these holy-days:

  1. Make a list of what you have to buy for gifts, food, etc and stick to it
  2. Arrange or group your shopping according to geographic location
  3. Try to do what you need to do during the week and not during the weekend
  4. Schedule time to pamper yourself, i.e. a massage, half day at a spa, relaxing lunch with a friend before the actual holidays
  5. Pause to breathe and re-group when you feel overwhelmed
  6. Practice honoring your boundaries and saying no
  7. Take some time daily to be on your own and in silence, even ten minutes will do!

Holidays provide the best ground for personal growth as our buttons tend to get pushed from multiple sources.  Practice staying centered this Holiday season, true to what you want for yourself and your loved ones, and do your best to relax and take care of yourself above all!

About the author: Liliane Mavridara is a published author, poet, writing mentor and creative groupwork facilitator who supports entrepreneurs in the healing and creative arts to have a successful business and a harmonious lifestyle while making a big difference,

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Networking is still important, even with social media.

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

With the advent of social media sites, a lot of business owners think this is all they need. They mistakenly believe that good old fashion person to person networking is dead.Nothing could be farther from the truth.

The fact is it is more important than ever to make these human connections. It actually will make connecting online more powerful when you have met your online friends face to face.

Networking has been a really important part of my business – the connections have kept my business alive and well. A lot of people get the wrong idea about how to go about networking with groups. It isn’t the immediate sale that you are looking for it is long lasting relationships. Being know for you expertise and building trust with other movers and shakers in you communities is priceless. These are the types of people you want in your circle of business friends.

In every city and town there are business networking groups – you may have to go to several before you settle on the one you want to attend regularly. When you do go to a networking event I have 10 tips that will help you make the connections you need.

9 tips to productive networking…

  1. Always bring a handful of business card – give a card to everyone you meet.
  2. Dress in business attire – first impressions are everything
  3. Go out of your way to meet people, introduce yourself
  4. Do not sell while networking. Your purpose is to make contacts not drive people away the minute you meet them.
  5. The best way to make conversation is to ask them questions about what they do.
  6. When you get home follow up by emailing them and letting them know you would like to keep in touch.
  7. Organize contacts on your – computer or smart phone. Using their business cards to make notes
  8. When making referrals think of people in your contact circle first. This is a good way of cementing your relationships.

So find a meeting to attend in your community – nothing but good can come from it… For help in promoting your business shoot me an email – I would love to chat…

Pamela Jacob Artista Design


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Negative Impressions WILL Kill Your Business

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

Being a designer I know the value of a good looking – and eye catching web site.

However, unlike some designers I also know the value of good content it is extremely important.

It is like first impressions – when you see someone you judge them within less than 3 minutes of meeting them. Whether you want to admit it or not – it is the truth, it is human nature.

Then if you decide to stick around and get to know this person your impression can change radically – you may find your judgment was right spot on, and you are impressed with them inside and out –or- you may find they are not what you though and they are superficial without any depth.

The same is true for your website.

The first page of your website should capture your visitor’s attention – highlight the positive aspects of your service or product. Capture the essence of what it is you are trying to convey.

Your home page should not be long winded with all the details you can find. It will bore or even turn off potential clients who will feel they do not have time to read it or just feel overwhelmed.

We all lead busy lives and don’t have time to read a novel on the first entrance to a website.

Once your visitor reads what you can do for them – the essence or spark of your service or product you want them to think “wow that is just what I need! Or I really want to know more!

At this point, they will go deeper into your website. They are hooked – That is where you can take the time to explain the benefits they will receive – and what your product/service is all about.

So many times I have a client who wants to put everything but the kitchen sink on the first page

– resist this temptation -.

The truth is the simpler and more descriptive the first page the better – always focus on your visitor – what it will do for the customer or how it will solve client problems…

It makes you visitors want to go further and investigate what you have to offer. However, if your content is too long winded – watered down or just grammatically incorrect, I will guarantee they will not stay on your website to see what you have to offer.

Once someone likes what they see (and read) – they will go further and want to know more details…

So think about it – do you need to refurbish you website – simplify the copy on your home page and make it more appealing to visitors who stop by???

For more tips and tricks on how to have a more profitable website – sign up to receive articles by email (see side bar above).

Pamela Jacob – Artista Design

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Sexual Fearing

Comments (0) Boomer Life, Business, Education, Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

Do men sabotage successful women? I think some do. I think some men just can’t understand the essence of this very common phenomenon.

Much has been written about the new generation of young men – the “millennials” as they are called – that they have been coddled by over protective mommies of my generation; that they have been helicoptered and micromanaged to the point of perennial adolescence and now are ensconced in “Peter Pan syndrome” for the long haul. It is said that their female counterparts are soaring ahead in education and career, even in this down economy.

But what of the mommies? Do we “ baby boomers” fight off male angst while our daughters tackle apathy?

Male Angst #1 – the Media

I have a friend who is the President and CEO of a community bank chain – her mother is the Chairman of the Board. They have six robust branches along a busy corridor in the San Francisco Bay area. Her mother has been an iconic female force for many years, having raised ten children (five she gave birth to and five step-children), while putting herself through school, becoming an investment broker and a banker along the way. My friend, the eldest daughter, not quite a score younger, followed suit with Mom as mentor. Like most of us her tap dance is continual, with the rich obligations of wife and mother. However, I rarely pass the bank on Sunday mornings when I don’t see her car parked outside, and she alone, putting in a few hours of work. She does not advertise how hard she works, nor feels compelled to.

They both are “hot” women. They are as good looking as they are savvy and they aren’t the least bit interested in hiding any of their assets. They are also extraordinarily community minded and philanthropic, giving thousands of dollars to scads of causes and non-profs – the most of any bank in this area. They also spend countless hours volunteering their time and expertise on a smorgasbord of charitable boards and commissions.

It recently occurred to me that they’ve been the victims of some bank bashing by male reporters. Since they have succeeded where many banks have floundered or failed since the 2008 bust, a few news guys pick at non-existent scabs, stepping right on the border of unethical reporting, though God knows these days the media is myopic when it comes to objectivity. A problem bank that is women-owned seems a tastier morsel than one that is meeting goals.

However, my friend and her mother never stoop to low levels in the pond – they don’t believe in bending down. While I want to attack the scum, they quietly move on and up, ignore the bait and fish more ambitious waters. They continue to succeed.

Male Angst #2 – the Politicians

A male county supervisor is retiring here and will ultimately succumb to pancreatic cancer, and my video company has been commissioned to act as testimonial documentarians. His female appointee will greatly tip the sex balance on the board at four females and one male, something I gave little thought to until it was demonstrably brought to my attention.

At his retirement ceremony, a (fat, old, sloppy, “good ‘ol boy) former supervisor moved to the podium to give his commendations. He had obviously given a lot of thought to the female leaning equation. Before speaking he handed out copies of a thirty-year old newspaper article, heralding the fact that with the appointment of this retiree, replacing the sole female ever elected to the Board of Supervisors in this county (currently one our U.S. Senators), this body would now be 100% male.

“Those were the good old days,” he lamented loudly to the lone male on the dais – “I pity you, you poor bastard.” What should have been a tribute to a man retiring in ill health, became a “diss” to the women sitting on the board and all the women in the room. For no apparent reason.

Last week California celebrated the 100th anniversary of suffrage in this state. Women have been elected to political offices on every level and have served with incredible distinction. Most of the time, they’ve given very little thought to their sex as they work through the tasks at hand. They are too busy tap dancing and achieving to laud their accomplishments as females. It seems some men on the other hand, find it important to take note of gender, and criticize and misrepresent information about their successful female counterparts.

Whether angst or apathy, I think the real emotion at play in either case, is fear.

The enemy is fear. We think it is hate; but, it is fear.

Copyright Oct. 2011

Christine Scioli

All Rights Reserved


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What To Do When You Don’t Know What to Do

Comments (0) Entrepreneurs, Holistic Living/Life

Being an independent and self-sufficient entrepreneur, daily planning and routine tend to put me in a specific mental loop which is wonderful for reaching my goals and get things done.

However, sometimes I can brood and think over and over what to do on a specific topic and before I know it, it is already a few hours later and I am so caught up into the same mental vicious cycle, that the promise of a clear vision is nowhere to be found.

Here are three tips that I have found useful when you look to get clear on what is important to do next:

1)    Go for a walk and distance yourself from the issue at hand. Walking and breathing fresh air have both physiological and psychological benefits. The space you create by distancing yourself from what is in front of you, allows for creative solutions to come in and match your innate guidance.

2)    Get into your body, dance, do yoga, breathe, go upside own.  When you spend prolonged time thinking and are caught up in the mental stream, you lose track of the grounding that comes from being in your body.  Any physical activity you enjoy will succeed in that, and once more by being grounded you can tap into your guidance.

3)    Make a list of the pros and cons of option A and option B. Get it all out on paper and visually see which option has the most pros.  Even though this is a mental activity it nevertheless allows for the outward materialization of your concerns, doubts, fears and whatever may have been in your mind that was blocking a leeway to what was important in the first place.

Experiment with the above tips, note your experience, and please share it with us on the Kalon Women Blog!

About the author: Liliane Mavridara is a published author, poet, book writing mentor and creative groupwork facilitator who supports entrepreneurs in the healing and creative arts to have a successful business, make a difference and have fun all along.

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Exploring Nutrition and Supplements to Help Lower Stress and Anxiety

Comments (1) Education, Health, Holistic Living/Life

Throughout my personal journey to mental wellness, I research information that’s outside of the conventional realm.  Several years ago, I was fortunate to hear of an educational series sponsored by NAMI and Safe Harbor It truly changed the way I viewed options available for overcoming anxiety and other mental health disorders.

The two speakers, Dr. Nancy Mullan of Burbank, California and Professor Jim Croxton from Santa Monica College were amazing.  When I share this story told by Professor Croxton, my wish is that it will start a shift in the way you view achieving mental wellness.

Professor Croxton told the audience that when his daughter turned 14, she started displaying symptoms of a mental health condition.  The symptoms worsened so the Croxton’s took their daughter for a psychiatric evaluation.  The diagnosis was devastating.  They were told that their daughter had developed severe schizophrenia and would most likely have to be institutionalized for most of her life if the symptoms could not be managed.  After visiting several other psychiatrists, the diagnosis was the same.  Then a family friend told the Croxton’s about another option.

Their friend suggested that they take their daughter to a nutritional specialist and have her tested for food and mold allergies.  Feeling that they had nothing to lose, they followed this advice and the news was amazing.  Their daughter had a condition called Celiac Disorder, which is an extreme allergy to wheat and gluten.  After just seven days of a wheat and gluten-free diet, their daughter’s symptoms diminished and thereafter disappeared completely.

Much of the information I am sharing comes from books by Julia Ross, The Mood Cure and The Diet Cure.  Gary Null also has books on nutrition to reduce stress and anxiety.  Good Food, Good Mood is one of them.  The Mood Cure is one of my favorite reference books.

Disclaimer:  If you are taking medications, are pregnant or nursing, please consult with your physician or practitioner before beginning a supplement or remedy protocol.

What Feeds the Body, Feeds the Brain

Rather than going into information overload, I’m providing a brief overview of each topic.  If there is any topic on which you would like me to expand, e-mail me and contact information is on my website.

Supplements and Remedies 101

5-HTP and GABA (gamma-amino-butric acid) are two of the many amino acids needed by the body.  “Amino acids are the building blocks of proteins. They band together in chains to form the stuff from which your life is born. Think of amino acids as Legos for your life.  The essential amino acids must be ingested every day. Failure to get enough of even one of the 10 essential amino acids can result in protein degradation. The human body simply does not store amino acids for later use, as it does with fats and starches.”  (Source:

Amino acids help naturally increase serotonin levels in the brain.  “In the United Kingdom, standard psychiatric practice calls for the addition of tryptophan when SSRI’s or other antidepressants don’t work well.”  (Source: Pharmacological choices after one antidepressant fails: “A survey of UK psychiatrists.”  Book:  The Mood Cure.)

The United Kingdom, in my opinion, is more advanced when it comes to the use of psychiatric medications.  Visit to learn more.

As this information shows, amino acids have many uses.  They can help some achieve relief from stress and anxiety without medication, boost properties of current medication and they can also help minimize withdrawal symptoms when tapering off medication.  “You must get professional advice about how to taper off… Consult with a physician, pharmacist … a professional who really knows the ropes to advise you and your doctor.”  (Source: The Mood Cure.)

Visit to learn more about amino acid therapy.

If you are interested in more detail about any of the information contained in this blog, please e-mail me.  Contact information is on my website.

Calms by Hyland’s

“Hyland’s Calms Tablets provide needed relief to symptoms related to nervousness, nervous exhaustion and stress. Many testimonials praise its soothing and calming effect in the face of life’s every-day stresses.”  Hyland’s has other products like Calms Forte as a natural sleep aid and products formulated especially for children.

How do Flower Remedies work?

Flower essences are water-based solutions which contain the essential energies of flowers. They are made by floating flowers in water and allowing the light of the sun (or in some cases the moon or stars) to help the water absorb the energy signature of the flowers. The structure of the water molecule is such that it can store these energies.

When a person places a few drops of a flower essence under the tongue, the energy of the flower floods one’s aura, vibrating at its own special frequency, and can nudge the vibrations in a person’s aura toward their own frequency. This creates an immediate effect on the emotional and spiritual levels of the aura.

Rescue Remedy (Bach Flower Remedies)

Note:  Both Calms and Flower Remedies such as Rescue Remedy are formulated for adults, children and animals.  There are 38 remedies and you can read about the properties of each one to find the right remedy for you.

El Sereno Essences Flower Remedies

El Sereno Essences are similar to Bach Flower Remedies and produced locally in California.  Reading the properties of the essences guides you to which one would work best for each issue.

To read more about my story, please visit my website at

Disclaimer: The information contained in this article is provided for your general information only. Kalon Women does not give medical advice or engage in the practice of medicine. Kalon Women under no circumstances recommends particular treatment for specific individuals and in all cases recommends that you consult your physician or local treatment center before pursuing any course of treatment.


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3 Daily Tips To Keep You On Track And In Your Heart

Comments (0) Entrepreneurs, Holistic Living/Life

As an entrepreneur I know what a challenge it is, and some days more than others, to stay centered throughout daily activities, especially if you are handling many things at the same time, i.e. at work, home and family.

How you start your morning I find to be the most important component in how the rest of the day will go.  You may have had that experience of waking up having slept “at the wrong side”, and you are all cranky; the rest of the day is colored by that morning impression.  Similarly then, when you wake up and set an intent for your day, consciously starting it off as you wish it to be, the rest will unfold accordingly.

Inspiration is the next on my list. What inspires you and keeps you motivated throughout your day?

I regard this inspiration as something that connects me to my heart’s joy, i.e. a picture on my desktop of beautiful Seattle in the hot summer days, a song that makes me smile and sing its tune constantly, a flower that its fragrance elevates my mood.  The purpose of all the above is to bring me back to my center from where I speak, make my decisions and direct my thoughts.

The third tip has to do with pausing and connecting to your breath throughout the day.  You would think this is easy and why should you bother, however I am here to challenge you to count how many times you actually do that during your daily routine.

Personally, I find it fascinating how easily I get off track and absorbed in what needs to be done in the next hour, day or whatever the case may be. It is a constant practice and what works for me is a reminder on my desktop or bathroom mirror saying “take a deep breath”, or “pay attention to your breath”.

To summarize the 3 daily tips for staying focused and in your heart:

1)      Start your day with an intent

2)      Stay inspired

3)      Check-in with your breath throughout the day

Practice with the above tips for a week and note your experience, and please share it with us on the Kalon Women Blog!

About the author: Liliane Mavridara is a published author, poet, book writing mentor and creative groupwork facilitator who supports professionals in the healing and creative arts to have a successful business, make a difference and enjoy their life all along.

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How to ask for what you want…and get it!

Comments (0) Business, Education, Entrepreneurs

Asking for what you want is the necessary first step in getting what you want. That’s the way it works! If you don’t ask, you don’t get – simple.

Simple. Really?

If it was so simple, then why are less than 15% of C-level positions in corporate America occupied by women, although they comprise 47% of the U.S. labor force? And women only own 1% of the world’s wealth.

Are women not asking for or wanting higher level positions? Are they resisting leadership, decision-making and authority roles? Do women shy away from being in situations of power, wealth and influence?

Women are still being the “good girl” aka polite and self-sacrificing. This translates into passivity, ineffectiveness, and being poor. Women aren’t feeling free enough to state what they want, ask for it and demand to get it. Did you cringe at the word “demand?” If so, then this is for you.

Here are the 5 things you need to have in place before you ask for anything, especially what you want.

Recognize what you want. You will never get what you want if you aren’t sure of it. Too many women ask for something that they have no idea if it’s for them or not. They listen to what others say they should want. Not a good idea. You only end up with wants that belong to someone else. Rather, think of what will further your growth, your influence and your power.

Ask in an optimistic way – Negotiate for you and them. When you appear selfish and self-centered, you won’t get what you want. Perception is critical. If you appear timid, doubtful or egotistical, then you’ll be seen as unworthy of getting what you are asking for. Everyone who goes to bat for you wants to be certain you are worthy of their time and efforts.

Ask the right person. You’ll never get what you want when you chase the wrong person and expect them to open doors, give you opportunities or believe in you. Do your homework and think of your request for the long term. Study who controls the string to what you want. Who is the ultimate decision maker? What are they willing to do for you? Finding the right person may take some time, so be patient.

Expect to get what you ask for. This is probably the most important factor in getting what you ask for. If you decide that you have a 50-50 chance of getting it, then you are already half-beaten. Believe you deserve what you are asking for. If you don’t, then no one will. What goes on in the mind is 90% of your reality.

Don’t stop asking. This means not fearing the word “no.” Rather, set your sights higher and go back. Find another route if necessary. Approach your situation or what you desire from a different standpoint. But under no circumstances should you surrender what you want because someone told you no. Women who conquer the fear know their value, their skills, and their talent.

When women start asking for and expecting to get what they want, they will. It takes practice and more practice. Start with something small. Negotiate with your kids or spouse. Make solid, confident requests of friends. Graduate to the bigger things when you are ready. But don’t wait too long; take charge and strike when it’s hot.

The Top 5 Characteristics Of Being The Leader People Follow

Being the boss can be difficult at times. Making the tough decisions, giving people a second chance, being held accountable, taking responsibility, and being unpopular all go along with the territory. But what does it take to be the female leader in charge?

You may ask yourself daily if people will ever give you the benefit of the doubt, trust your instincts and let you lead. If so, then here are 5 characteristics that will help engage and connect with people you need to lead.

  1. Set the tone. The environment is about how people feel around you. Are you approachable? Do you show interest in them as people? Do you disclose about yourself? Is the workplace fun? If you answered no or aren’t certain, then you have some work to do.
  2. Support your followers. Respect who you delegate to. Trust they have the skills and abilities to get the job done. Explore their potential. Take a chance on them. Ask them how they need to be supported.
  3. Be available. Listen to your followers’ suggestions. Listen for what makes them get up in the morning or, for that matter, what keeps them awake at night. Don’t hole up in your office. Make sure the lines of communication are open and not just one way. Be a person of your word. Follow through on what you promise and never betray a confidence.
  4. Provide feedback – frequently. Don’t wait for the annual review to share what isn’t working. Whether it’s good or bad, give your attention to who needs you. Providing constant feedback helps your followers improve tremendously. They begin to trust you and what you stand for. They believe in your goals and direction for the company.
  5. Show compassion. Remember the people who follow you aren’t just followers; they are people with feelings, needs, and ideas. Show that you care about them.

By: Karen Keller

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Flash Web Sites are Beautiful – But – Are They For You?

Comments (0) Business, Education, Entrepreneurs

I often have people asking me can you do a flash site for my business ? They love the flow, modern look and elegance that can be obtained.

I will ask them “are you sure?” You will pay much more to develop the website and it may not be profitable.

They don’t always want to listen to that – but I owe them the truth! I could say oh yes (because I would make a lot more money) that is exactly what you need. But that is not what 99% of online businesses need. (more…)

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Comments (1) Addiction/Codependency, Health, Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

I recently read a letter online that a distraught middle-aged woman had written to a life coach. She said she had been happily married for seven years to a well known “relationship expert”.

She said they have filed for divorce and her life is now unrecognizable from the life they had for many years. The woman is over 40 now and is depressed and crying every night, wondering why her husband discarded her, why she didn’t see it coming, and why she didn’t recognize his narcissism before it was too late.

She ended the letter by saying that she was writing with tears in her eyes. That she usually is very strong and tough, but the divorce has shattered her to the point she is not sure she will ever recover, yet he has so easily moved on.

When I was dating my now ex-husband back in 1978, I was annoyed by an attitude he had, which I couldn’t quite name or put my finger on. I rationalized that only sometimes was he a selfish, immature, thoughtless jerk that made my blood boil; and I knew he would outgrow it. I didn’t know anything about Narcissistic Personality Disorder, or NPD.

My ex was handsome, in medical school, and a great catch by most people’s standards, but I turned down his first marriage proposal because of that “obnoxious attitude” he had. After a lecture from my BFF about what a fool I was and what a wonderful life we would have, I changed my mind and married him.

Sadly, I identify with the distraught woman I mentioned earlier. One of the hardest things I have had to accept is that it’s been five years since my ex suddenly left me at age 51; and I am still picking up the pieces…yet, he moved on instantly and apparently never had one down day.

How can that happen? How can someone discard their life partner like used chewing gum and never look back for a single second?

Well…it’s because The Narcissist isn’t connected to their partner and isn’t capable of really loving them.

When my sons were in middle school, I sought counseling to try to understand why I was so angry. My male therapist explained to me that I was angry because my husband “wasn’t connected to me” and I was being emotionally neglected.

I could not comprehend what the therapist was telling me. I was certain my husband loved me, and I literally tried to convince the therapist that he did; while at the same time, I was being told that my best option was to leave my husband.

Years later, after he left me, a second therapist suggested to me that I had been dealing with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders…”the essential feature of Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and lack of empathy that begins by early adulthood and is present in a variety of contexts”.

“Narcissists possess an exaggerated sense of importance concerning themselves and their work. Work and Self come first while other people, especially close, intimate relationships, become less important. A narcissist would say, “I’m more important than you and so is my work” says Paul J. Hannig, Ph.D.,MFCC.

The DSM says that 75% of those with NPD are men.  Can you think of any politicians or other high profile men who just might be narcissists? In 2008, Emily Friedman wrote the following piece for ABC News:

John Edwards, former senator, one-time vice presidential nominee and two-time Democratic presidential hopeful, can now add one more title to his resume: self-proclaimed narcissist.

The North Carolina native, who just last week admitted to cheating on his wife with documentary filmmaker Rielle Hunter, told ABC News that his time in the political limelight fed into his self-adoration so much so that his personal life eventually became the latest high-profile sex scandal.

“[My experiences] fed a self-focus, an egotism, a narcissism that leads you to believe you can do whatever you want,” said Edwards, admitting that he cheated on his wife, Elizabeth, with Hunter to ABC News’ Bob Woodruff. “You’re invincible. And there will be no consequences.”

Feeling invincible and having no regard for the consequences your actions may have, is not uncommon for men who fill powerful posts, several psychologists told, and are common attributes of narcissists.

“There is something about a lot of the people in power that they think the rules no longer apply to them or they’re above the rules,” said Wendy Behary, an expert specializing in narcissism and the author of Disarming the Narcissist.

Mark Held, a clinical psychologist in suburban Denver who specializes in treating overachievers told that “people who go into certain fields are much more prone to get involved in these kinds of things—they’re people who seek power and need validation,” Held said.

Miami based psychotherapist Samuel Lopez De Victoria describes narcissists as people who get a high from getting attention and who often are unaware of the chance that they might get caught misbehaving.

In turn, De Victoria said, “not only does a narcissist become unable to consider the effect his actions could have on his own career or personal life, but it also inhibits him from considering the feelings of those around him.”

If you think you might be involved with a narcissist, the internet abounds with information on this disorder. Some experts say narcissism is incurable, therefore, you should run in the other direction post-haste.

I have read several excellent books on this topic, and I recommend Why is it Always About You?: The Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism, by Sandy Hotchkiss, or Narcissistic Lovers: How to Cope, Recover and Move On, by Cynthia Zayn and Kevin Dibble, M.S.

Cheryl Alexandra Michaels CPC, CSC   Cheryl is a Certified Professional Coach and Spiritual Coach.  She is a Reiki Master, an Angel Therapy™ Practitioner and a Reconnective Healing™ Practitioner.  She lives in the suburbs of Seattle, Washington.

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Anxiety Disorder – The Basics for Seeking Treatment

Comments (1) Health

Currently statistics show that over 40 million adults live with some type of anxiety disorder.  Most of these adults are women.  That’s the grim news.  The great news is that, out of all the mental health disorders documented, anxiety disorder is the most treatable and manageable.  About 30% of people seek help.  Stigmas surrounding mental health disorders prevent the other 70% from seeking help.

Living with a Mental Health Disorder is Nothing about which Anyone Should Feel Shame or Embarrassment (more…)

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Think You Don’t Need a Logo? Think Again!

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

One of the most basic things you need for your company is a logo.

A logo is an image that represents your company. It can be an illustration, a symbol, a name, or a combination of these. A proper logo works to project your desired company image.

You may be one of those people who think a logo is not a big deal, I beg to differ.

I run into people all the time that think having a logo designed is a “waste of money” but nothing can be farther from the truth.

Why is a logo important in the grand scheme of things? (more…)

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A Woman’s Definition of Success

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

Women are redefining the meaning of success – on their terms. They’re giving it a much needed makeover. Well-defined success factors or keys to success are important to a woman’s identity, to her sense of accomplishment and to her total acceptance of her success.

Women have defined success, particularly business success, according to other people’s rules.

They are challenging the “This-is-my-measuring-stick-and-it-can’t-be-broken,” mentality that women have lived with for too long. They’re breaking the stick. No longer do you have to accept success as a financial number, a career position or a number of years on the job.

The process of defining success can be a rich journey, or it can be a path laden with indecision and uncertainty. Success for women is a journey with peaks and valleys, setbacks and mistakes, achievement and disappointment.
How you define success is actually your key to success. Here is a process to help you reach clarity on your definition of success.

Find Your Balance. Anything in excess is not a good thing. Too much money, power, and sugar can result in a huge ego, unfounded expectations, or high blood pressure. In creating your success definition, remember that there is always a payoff.

In starting and building your business from the ground up, are you willing to sacrifice the time away from your family required to do it? Will you lose sight of your goal because of deficits in another area of your life?
Know Your Altruistic Values. What is important to you outside of yourself? How will your actions affect your friends, the community, and the world beyond? Is what you are doing or who you are contributing to others? Is it moral? Is it righteous?

If you are willing to sacrifice your integrity to attain a goal, you might achieve your goal, but you will not be a success. Keep in mind that at different times in your life, you will have different definitions of success. Sometimes women get caught up in one goal and define their life around that goal when there are really multiple stages of success throughout your life.

What you found to be a feeling of great success while attending college may not be the same as when you are holding your granddaughter.

Success is a determination of what you value at a certain time in your life. It’s evident in how you think, feel and breathe. Are your desires in the forefront, or do you help for the sake of helping, regardless of great personal sacrifice? The only gauge of that is in your soul.

Develop Your Character. What you speak comes from your heart. It’s your internal qualities that drive real success. If you are deplete, not possessing a honorable, high-quality character built on integrity, honesty and selflessness, you will never attain the true success that could be yours.

A dictionary can give you a definition of success, but real success is only determined by you – based on your needs, wants, integrity, values and beliefs. A woman’s definition of success begins with her character. Being authentic is being true to your belief system and your guiding principles.

What will your definition of success be? It could be a money goal, lifestyle change, good health, or use of time. It can be just about anything, but you will need to dig deep and do some serious soul searching to discover what success means to you.

About the Author: Karen Keller
Influence and persuasion expert, Karen Keller, Ph.D. is a clinical psychologist and Master Certified Coach with over 25 years of experience. She focuses on women’s leadership and empowerment as well as executive, personal, relationship and life coaching. She is also a successful entrepreneur and author. Her other areas of specialization include mentoring, sales techniques, success skills, intuition, body language, management development training, motivational speaking, and corporate training. Discover Influence It! Real POWER for Women now! For your free subscription visit

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Never Underestimate the Persuasive Power of a Woman!

Comments (2) Business, Entrepreneurs

The influential woman consists of an array of qualities that are not mistaken for anything other than influential. She is strong. She is confident. People take notice when she walks into the room. She commands the respect that she has earned.

Every woman can be an influential woman. But it doesn’t happen without effort on your part. Where do you start? How do you recognize influential traits?

The influential woman knows her mind. She has a heighten awareness of what she wants. Knowing and displaying her competencies, she approaches her life with self-reliance. She has a high emotional intelligence, identifying, assessing and influencing her emotions as well as others. For example, she discovers a co-worker that she relies on isn’t delivering on time. She doesn’t rush in, ready to explode. She evaluates the situation; the consequences, ways to solve the issue, who’s involved and what is to be learned from it. This happens in a few minutes for the influential women.

The influential woman evaluates the potential of every situation, so she can know what and how much she needs to invest in it. She asks herself these three very valuable questions:

• What will this opportunity do for me?
• What are the possible challenges or problems of this opportunity?
• What is required of me to grasp this opportunity?

Guarding her boundaries is another top quality of the influential woman. She knows when to say yes but equally when to say no. If the request violates her boundaries or ethical standards, she can quickly provide an alternative option or put her foot down. This applies in her personal and professional life. Working with integrity is an absolute.

The influential woman knows how to compete with the “big boys.” She doesn’t apologize for being ambitious and wanting more. Being a “small player” doesn’t discourage her. She knows how to offer more, better and smarter. She sees herself as agile, able to act quickly and use her power.

The influential woman knows the power of forgiveness, compassion, and generosity. She knows how to claim her place in the world, and so can you.

About the Author: Karen Keller
Influence and persuasion expert, Karen Keller, Ph.D. is a clinical psychologist and Master Certified Coach with over 25 years of experience. She focuses on women’s leadership and empowerment as well as executive, personal, relationship and life coaching. She is also a successful entrepreneur and author. Her other areas of specialization include mentoring, sales techniques, success skills, intuition, body language, management development training, motivational speaking, and corporate training. Discover Influence It! Real POWER for Women now! For your free subscription visit

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Florida Nixed in Kiplinger’s Top 10 States for Retirees

Comments (2) Finance and Money

For many of us, retirement may seem far down the road or it may be looming around the corner. I, for one, am not ready for retirement in many ways. But I have realized, as I have watched my parents deal with a variety of challenges in their recent retirements, things are more complex than I thought. Our quality of living might depend on where we live as much as how much we are receiving from qualified retirement accounts and social security.

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Driving Free Traffic to Your Website

Comments (2) Business, Education, Entrepreneurs

I am often asked “what is the best way to drive traffic to my website”. There are so many ways to market your website and get results some take a lot of time to cultivate and some can produce traffic right off the bat.

In order to drive traffic you need to know the options available – and then plan your strategy.

There are free ways – you don’t have to pay money but you do have to spend time to get where you want to go. Those of you on a shoe string budget may not have the cash to advertise or use Pay-Per-Click methods.

Remember even the best designed websites will not produce income unless there is traffic directed to it…

. Free traffic, as the term suggests, implies that you drive traffic to your website free of charge. The most common method of obtaining this involves usingSearch Engine Optimization (SEO) techniques. When you optimize your website, search engines view your site as being useful and relevant. This in turn, leads to increase in rankings for your keywords, key phrases.

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3 Things to Know About the Truth Behind Your Influence

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

Being influential can mean the difference between success and failure. Yours.

Influence is touted to women as an outer or external component as a means of getting what you want.

This is logical IF you accept influence as how to exert power over someone or a situation. James Ford (article) instructs leaders on the five sources of power to influence people: reward power, coercive power, legitimate power, expert power and referent power. (more…)

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7 Personal Power Qualities of Influential Women

Comments (1) Business, Entrepreneurs

Personal power makes a woman influential. Her personal power is what is left when other powers (money, position, relational) are lost to her.

Women are learning the value of their personal power. For years, they have invested in the belief of being powerless. Competing desires, thoughts, and feelings interfered with accessing their power. Many times these competing desires included the desire to please or do for others.

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Don’t leave it to chance analyze your website NOW!

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

If you have been on the internet for any length of time I am sure you have heard of Google analytics – and if you haven’t then there is no time like the present to learn how to use it.

This amazing tool will do everything from telling you where your visitors are coming from, what nation, what search engine, what web page. How long they stayed on your site, if they are a new/unique visitor and so much more.

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Texas Two-Step—One Step Forward, One Step Back

Comments (0) Finance and Money

After handing Amazon a bill for back-sales taxes owed, Texas lawmakers are now taking a step back. Although the bill is not explicitly written for Amazon, the American-Statesman states that critics called the action a “Hail Mary pass” for “Amazon in its dispute with Texas over whether it should have to collect sales taxes on Texas transactions.”

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Other Side of the Coins

Comments (0) Finance and Money

A little known fact about sales tax collection is that states generally allow businesses who collect and remit sales tax on their behalf to retain a portion of the sales taxes collected to help relieve their burden. This reimbursement for their trouble is rarely discussed during the latest arguments over collection of sales taxes and may be at risk with some states. In most states, vendor compensation is only granted if the payment of sales tax occurs on time.

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10 unwritten rules for working women

Comments (1) Boomer Life, Business, Entrepreneurs

1. Men get the benefit of the doubt. Men generally get hired on their promise and women on their demonstrated experience. Men are usually taken at their word, while women get challenged more, required to deliver data and substantiation for their views. Chicken or egg: Do men get the benefit of the doubt because they are better qualified, or are they better qualified because they get the benefit of the doubt?

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Using Massage Therapy For Your Health

Comments (0) Health

In today’s society there are lots of health options. Traditional medicine has not always had all the answers. I had a physician once acknowledge to me that doctors only understand about less than 10% of the brain. That began my journey to learn more about holistic options for healthy living. Kind of an oxymoron, huh? What other options are there for healthy living but natural ones??

My journey began 20 years ago. I admit the journey has been slow—I only developed a great appreciation of “heal thyself” over the past 7-10 years when I began to commit to regular massage therapy to deal with muscular pain originating from sitting in a car long hours, prior car accidents and sitting at a computer for lengthy periods of time. I found that taking breaks and walks didn’t help as much as I’d hoped. I made the commitment to regular massage therapy every 6 weeks for 4 years.

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Why write an E-Book? Why not!

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

I am just about done with my third book. It is amazing how sharp and clear one can get when writing a book – it really sharpens your senses and your knowledge. E-books can be wonderful tool, and they are worth all the effort you put into them.

What an amazing way to let people know you are an expert in your field, it gives you such credibility.

What a fantastic way to promote your business while bringing in new streams of revenue…

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Ageism on Facebook

Comments (3) Boomer Life

Sigh. Yet another example of ageism has reared its ugly head in my world and this time it’s personal!! Social networking sites such as Facebook, My Space, Twitter, LinkedIn, are being invaded by, OMG, SENIORS! Can the implosion of our world as our kids know it be far behind?

I’m shaking my head at this latest twist of ageism, mostly because it’s just so silly for any age group to think they have a corner on any aspect of life – including social networking. And I’m shaking my head because this whole issue is just so incredibly blatant.

Bulletin to anyone under 50 – you are NOT alone. You do NOT have exclusive rights to social media sites. Get over your ice-flow mentality because we will not be sent to sea quietly!

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Tax Exemptions Under Fire

Comments (0) Finance and Money

In the current sales tax environment, more attention is being given to sales tax exemptions, their validity and appropriate use. According to The State, South Carolina’s Homepage, a recent lawsuit against the state is challenging sales tax exemptions. The law firm of “Lewis and Harpootlian said Monday the latest suit has merit because the number of exemptions has increased, and because of the fact the state now exempts more than it collects.” Lewis is quoted as saying, “The holes are eating the cheese.”

The State identified that $2.7 billion is collected in exemptions each year in the state of South Carolina, while only $2.19 billion is collected in annual sales tax revenue. “Of that amount, 4 percent goes to the state’s general fund, 1 percent to education, and 1 percent to property tax relief for homeowners.” That means for every exemption given, less money is available for educational purposes and to relieve homeowners of property tax burdens.

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Millions Lost! Or Millions Found?

Comments (0) Finance and Money

This just in from PR Newswire (May 3, 2011)―“Pennsylvania Losing Hundreds of Millions of Dollars Each Year.” Are they losing or did they just find hundreds of millions of dollars they could be collecting in sales tax revenue?

The Pennsylvania Alliance for Main Street Fairness recently released a study titled, “The Impact of Not Collecting Sales and Use Taxes from Internet Sales into Pennsylvania.” The study reiterates the basics of sales tax, reminding us that you pay tax to a retailer with a physical presence (nexus) in the state but an out-of-state retailer is not obligated by law to collect and remit sales tax to your state of residence. Residents are required, on their own integrity, to report purchases made with out-of-state retailers and pay appropriate taxes to the state of residence—this is referred to as a use tax.

According to the study, Pennsylvania could be collecting from $246 Million to $398 Million in additional sales tax revenue if they were able to require out-of-state retailers, specifically Internet retailers with no nexus in the state, to collect and remit sales tax to the state for purchases shipped to Pennsylvania.  In addition to the amount that could potentially be collected, benefits would include increased purchasing by residents from retailers within the state, which would result in an increase of jobs, increasing employment rates and increasing how many individuals would be purchasing consumable goods. This flow down could continue to even more positive benefits for the state and its residents, if calculations are correct.

More than one retailer within a state has declared that Internet sales hurts their business even if the prices are the exact same for an item—the opportunity to pay no sales tax, shipping aside, is very attractive to consumers. Should an Internet retailer offer “super free shipping,” then it is perhaps a no-brainer to purchase online in order to avoid the additional 6-10% in sales tax.

Pattie Diggin, owner of a retail store in Pennsylvania confirms this concern, quoted by PR Newswire as saying, “Today’s customer is always looking for some type of savings or discount, which I offer when appropriate.  I wish I could mark down my sales on a regular basis by an additional 6%, but I can’t and it’s a financial burden that is completely unfair.” She goes on to express that “…the easiest and most sensible way…” for the playing field to be leveled regarding sales tax “…is for remote vendors to collect and remit the tax at time of purchase.”

Remove this roadblock to fair commerce and all vendors are on a similar playing field of how to source products in order to bring in the best products for the most reasonable prices—whether they choose to do online sales or foot the bill for a brick and mortar location. With even the big retail locations such as Barnes and Noble and Borders struggling with the electronic age, closing down brick and mortar locations and fighting to find ways to survive, it can only be an even greater struggle for small to medium sized businesses in today’s economy.

About the Author: Susan McLain has over 15 years experience in technical and marketing writing, graphic design, business development and marketing management. She currently works for Avalara, Inc., a Software-as-a-Service (SaaS) company providing automated solutions for sales and use tax compliance for businesses of all sizes. The AvaTax family of products provide accurate, to the rooftop sales tax calculation, automated exemption certificate management and seamless filing, reporting and remittance of sales tax liability.

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The quest for true beauty

Comments (0) Beauty/Fashion/Style, Health, Menopause

Throughout my career, it’s been my mission to do everything within my power to help women- AND men- reach a healthy place of self acceptance-and let me tell you, at times it’s been an uphill battle, especially when addressing body image and self esteem issues.

I deeply believe how a woman accepts herself depends largely upon the cultural and societal norms that prevail in her day to day life. Nowhere is this more apparent than as a woman hits midlife and begins the processes of peri menopause / Menopause.

Women’s responses to Menopause and the aging process in general vary significantly.

The more Menopause is viewed as a ‘loss’ -of youth, vitality, beauty- the more likely a woman will experience pain, illness and emotional issues as she makes the transition.

Coincidence? I don’t think so!

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Finding your stillpoint

Comments (0) Boomer Life, Health

“Only let the moving waters calm down; and the sun and moon will be reflected on the surface of your being.” ~ Rumi

What’s a stillpoint you ask? A stillpoint is the place where movement ceases and everything becomes clear as a result. Think of a rollercoaster – the kind that loops around first one way, then backwards through the loop, getting ever higher in its circle until the cars are at the top of the circle, hanging upside down – just hanging. THAT is a stillpoint. The object in motion has come to rest, balancing on its’ stillpoint. The same can be true for us even in the midst of our lives.

Our stillpoint is revealed to us when we can see through our conditioning, bring conscious compassion to all that we know and discover about ourselves, embrace all of who we are (warts and all), and find the freedom in the newness of life experiences. Some people would define it as the ageless connection with source energy, of merging with your divine for even just a moment… before the busy-ness of your linear mind, the connections of your relationships and the activities of your life come in and take over (which, as an entrepreneur, is exponentially more when the business-mind kicks in!). However, when we can attain our stillpoint, we have the opportunity to breathe with our entire being. We can stop the resistance, the struggle with what IS in appreciation of simply being.

One of my recent clients experienced her stillpoint for the first time. She hired me because her business wasn’t working. There weren’t enough clients, not enough money, too much to do, and a feeling of “not being enough”. Of course, when that starts, that message becomes internalized and becomes magnified as a vicious circle. She’s been going at a frenetic pace on all levels for nearly a year – she was worn down, fried out, and frustrated by other solutions she had tried but that didn’t make a difference. She’d tried time management, hiring a professional organizer, working with a marketing firm to handle her promotions, working with a life coach, and more – but each was a band-aid that addressed symptoms temporarily but didn’t last.

The reason was that she hadn’t met herself in the space of her stillpoint to remember her power, her true purpose, and the abundance of time to get what was truly important done – she not only had more than enough but she now knows that she IS more than enough in her stillpoint being. By taking a “break” to reconnect with her personal stillpoint, even though the first experience of it lasted less than a minute, she began to go beyond her current state to relate to a much bigger picture of herself.  She no longer views her past, or even her current state, as a predictor of what can be… and when she needs to fill up again on that level, now she can always access her stillpoint to feel the expansive focus of who she IS to align her world with that.

Take a minute to think about that… the expansive focus of your personal stillpoint…. What would that feel like? How do you get there?

Three Things You Can Do Today:

1.    Stop and be still. Give yourself permission to just stop. Close your eyes and imagine yourself as a blender that you turn off, or of being on a rollercoaster that just stops, or as a pebble that stops tumbling in the water to simply reflect the sun’s light. Be still. Breathe. Turn your conscious attention inward to find what your stillpoint looks like – it might look like you are a circle of light balanced at the top of a pyramid. It might be a feeling of the universe coming to a point in your center or a feeling of non-sensation in your body, as though you are free to do anything and gravity isn’t holding you. The most important thing is that you stop and be still – even if it’s less than a minute, it will help you to connect to your source energy, to that place where no one else can go but you.

2.    Pay attention to your near-wake or near-sleep state. In the few moments that dance between being asleep and waking up, or just before you fall asleep, the “veil” is thin for us because our conscious mind has already started to disengage or hasn’t quite engaged yet. In those “limbo” places, you can access your stillpoint more easily – the place where you are completely content and have no need to do anything other than be in that moment. If your conscious mind tries to horn in, you can sometimes push it back; over time, you will be able to prolong that in-between state to the extent that you might feel like you were there for a really long time (even if in chronological time it only lasted 30 seconds). It doesn’t take much to feel your stillpoint if you are attuned to doing so.

3.    Feel your feelings fully. When we are disconnected from, or don’t allow ourselves to feel, our feelings completely, they will find a way somehow to be acknowledged. Just like a child that demands to be heard, our feelings will find a way to get noticed. And “old” or “stuck” feelings can clog up our stillpoint because it becomes “noise” over time instead of a valid messenger in the moment. When you can be internally still enough to feel your feelings, and act accordingly, your internal world is in flow and you can more easily access your stillpoint.

And one last thought – taking the time to create a personal ritual for yourself can be a powerful way to access your stillpoint.

At the risk of using “woo-woo” language, connect with your stillpoint to be in who you are in the largest sense, and then bring that back into your everyday world for faster results on your priorities. It’s about vibrational creation from who you are in your most pure form to make manifest your gifts and desires in a tangible way. Imagine if everyone created their lives from the purity of their essential being… gives me the chills just thinkin’ about it!

Lynn Scheurell, Creative Catalyst, helps conscious entrepreneurs strengthen their inner systems, both personal and professional, for faster business results. She teaches renaissance souls how to gain clarity on their purpose by remembering who they are from their essential self, then aligning everything they do to express their unique gift through their business while working with natural energies for maximum support. Register for a free GEENI™ for Change ecourse to learn how to upgrade your life in just seven days at

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MO Considering Replacing Income Tax with Increased Sales Tax

Comments (0) Finance and Money

The Missouri Jobs and Prosperity Act targets removal of corporate and bank franchise taxes, elimination of income tax and greater flexibility for increases in sales tax to make up the difference.

Stalled for the moment, the “…Missouri Jobs and Prosperity Act…phases out the state individual income tax and replaces the corporate income tax, corporation franchise and bank franchise taxes, and state sales and use tax with a sales tax of up to 7% on retail sales of new tangible personal property and taxable services,” according to the Summary of the Committee Version of the Bill. (more…)

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The Amazon Law and Other Sales Tax Strategies

Comments (0) Finance and Money

Coined the “Amazon law,” many lawmakers in numerous states are moving forward to strive to enact laws that empower their states to require e-commerce businesses to collect and remit state sales taxes from residents of their state.

According to the Connecticut Mirror the “…Finance, Revenue and Bonding Committee voted 38-14…to adopt a measure commonly referred to as the ‘Amazon Law’ and patterned after legislation enacted in New York three years ago.”

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Scarcity or Abundance How Do You Run Your Business?

Comments (2) Business, Entrepreneurs

It seems there are two different types of people in business – givers and takers (non-givers).

Now you may be wondering what I mean by that, but if you have come into contact with very many business owners you will know exactly what I mean. The sad part about this whole scenario is that these people who are afraid to share knowledge, ideas, or experiences are losing out on some really good professional connections and customers. I believe the motivating factor of this type of business owner is thoughts of scarcity. They are afraid someone may get ahead by giving away what they know or steal their ideas and concepts leaving them with less.

If you have ever heard Wayne Dyer talk about scarcity and abundance it is really enlightening. Simply put, scarcity is the idea that your negative thoughts and fears propel your actions and bring about consequences. So if you think in a negative way things like “my business is dying I will never make it” – “I have no customers” or any number of pessimistic thoughts about not having enough – you will begin to notice things start to dry up. Then you start to panic and what happens? Just what you believed would.

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Tax Laws and the Land of Foo

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs, Finance and Money

Foo—the place between the possible and the impossible—a place you can only access where streets corners don’t line up. A place that is a bit uneven. Enter the state of Nebraska’s need to meet the requirements of federally mandated sewer improvements with bills over $1 billion.

Mayor Jim Suttle regurgitated a previously suggested idea to tax toilet paper at the federal level to help pay the bill. This most recent dive into the fantastic realm that allows governments to hope, imagine and dream is called the “toilet paper tax.”

Although this kind of proposal isn’t new—a similar measure was brought before the House in 2009—it does painfully bring to the forefront that there are very little places for states and government to go in order to bring in additional funds to pay for what we consider basic services.

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10 Ways to Improve Your Relationship (and Your Health!)

Comments (1) Boomer Life, Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

How many times have you found yourself frustrated in conversation with your mate trying to explain something important and walked away shaking your head in frustration saying to yourself, “He just doesn’t get it!” Your shoulders tense, your brows come together in that little crease and the tension headaches continue.

Well knock it off. He just doesn’t get it in your language.

We all have different languages and ways of interpreting love and affection based on our upbringing, gender, personal belief systems, and other life experiences and filters. The key to successful communication in relationships however is not assuming that just because something makes sense to you or is something that you enjoy, it must make sense or be something your spouse enjoys too.

You may be wondering what the heck successful communication has to do with improving your relationship and your health. Here’s the scoop. Studies done at the Institute of Heartmath have shown that stress and different emotional states affect our autonomic nervous system, hormonal and immune systems, heart and brain. Quite simply, they’ve proven that negative emotions impact our health in a negative way, and positive emotions impact our health in a positive way. While we occasionally do experience emotions on our own, they are more often than not the result of a successful (or unsuccessful) experience with someone else.

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Staying Up in Down Times

Comments (0) Boomer Life, Business, Entrepreneurs

Times are tough. We are at war. The economy is down and unemployment is up. Trusting others is down, blaming is up. Optimistic outlooks are down and fear is up.

Staying up in down times requires a blend of energy, spirit, self-confidence and humor. Perception must change and include a broader knowledge and more comprehensive view. What is your perspective of life and the world? Do your lenses and filters of life and the world include a wide-angle lens or do you use a microscope with a narrowed view?

1. Energy: When precious energy is spent trying to control elements that are out of our control we feel down. We must expand our thinking to include new knowledge. I heard a broadcaster say this about the war; “If the peaceniks think the war is about oil, then maybe we should consider bombing Canada because they supply more oil than Iraq. Our second target should be Mexico – not Iraq.”

This statement may make you angry, so we must remember that we do not control the perceptions of others.

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Six Steps to Harnessing the Power of LinkedIn

Comments (0) Business, Education, Entrepreneurs

Ever notice that some people have tons of connections in LinkedIn and some people have one?

While it is easy to sign up for a LinkedIn account, few people realize that their LinkedIn account can open doors to new business partnerships, potentials clients, and a wealth of information to aid in building a business. Although it is not exactly rocket science, establishing strong relationships in LinkedIn is quickly replacing lunch meetings and cold calls. And, the reason why is simple. You can easily meet and introduce yourself to a host of interesting and interested business contacts all with a few minutes. More importantly, you gain exposure to many other business owners and clients from across the street as well as across the world!

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SSUTA may grow an extra state member…Massachusetts

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs, Finance and Money

The Streamlined Sales and Use Tax Agreement (SSUTA) is an agreement created for states to “…assist states as they administer a simpler and more uniform sales and use tax system.” Each state has the opportunity to adopt the SSUTA and join the current 23 member states. Who will be next?

On April 7, the Massachusetts State Legislature’s Joint Committee on Revenue met and received testimony supporting H.B. 1695, a bill currently being considered that would allow Massachusetts to join the SSUTA. According to the ICSC (International Council of Shopping Centers), this “…is a critical step in leveling the playing field between community-based retailers and online retailers. As a member state, Massachusetts would be positioned to collect sales tax from remote sellers once Congress passes enabling legislation, known as the Main Street Fairness Act.”

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Sustainable eating: An easy way to celebrate Earth Day everyday

Comments (0) Boomer Life, Food and Drink, Health

You’ve heard the term tossed around enough by now…sustainability. What does it mean? Why does it matter?

Sustainability, in relation to food and agriculture, refers to production and harvesting methods that meet the needs of eaters while avoiding the exploitation of the land.

Sustain Web ( cites a list of seven criteria which identify sustainable produced food as well as sustainable consumption.

  1. Food that is locally grown and seasonally available. This isn’t always possible for people who live in urban areas or the North, where seasonal produce is very limited, but the more you can do to support your local growers, the better it will serve your economy. Also, when the late fall rolls around, that’s a great time to pick up storage produce (apples, potatoes, garlic, onions)… things that will keep in a cool, dry, dark place for several month. To me, it’s essential to get these in their most organic form as well, whenever possible. A really good organic storage potato, which costs a little more than its conventionally grown cousin, is totally worth it in terms of taste and texture.
  2. (more…)

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Who am I? What do I want? How did I get so lost? When do I come...

Comments (0) Boomer Life, Health

These are questions that I get on a regular basis from friends, family and our Kalon Women across the world. They all have to do with “self-discovery,” which seems to be a hot topic of discussion these days within the world of boomer women.

Personal growth is most often a slow and gradual process, and it can be difficult to recognize the magnitude of the changes taking place in our lives when we are too close to it. It is so important that we regularly acknowledge our ongoing growth and reward ourselves for the many wonderful steps of self-improvement we have accomplished. When we take a hard look at our own progress, we need never feel that we are wavering between past achievements and the realization of future goals.

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Use Taxes: To Collect or Not To Collect

Comments (0) Business, Finance and Money

Use tax laws exist in every state. The purpose of a use tax law is to ensure a resident of the state does not evade paying sales tax on consumable goods or services that are taxable within their state of residence. Use tax laws allow a state to legally collect tax on items that were purchased outside of the state or online where the tax was not collected and remitted by the retailer or service provider during the transaction.

Currently, only a few states have striven to collect use taxes from individuals. Some items are easier to collect use taxes on than others. For example, if you purchase a car in one state, then move to another state, there are some laws that require you pay sales tax on any newly purchased vehicle within a certain time frame.

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Tax Freedom Day

Comments (0) Business, Finance and Money

In a special report at it has been determined that “Tax Freedom Day will arrive on April 12 this year, the 102nd day of 2011.” According to wikipedia, Tax Freedom Day is “the first day of the year in which a nation as a whole has theoretically earned enough income to fund its annual tax burden.”

This fictional day indicates that “Americans will need to work 102 days — more than three months — just to earn enough to pay ther tax bill,” according to a piece released by Author Mark Bradshaw continues, “Each state has a different date due to incomes as well as higher or lower state and local taxes. Oklahoma’s Tax Freedom Day this year is April 2…That’s a full month before Connecticut, a week after Mississippi.”

Though the American focus is on income taxes this time of year, legislatures in many states are determining changes to state sales taxes; and local jurisidictions are likewise considering ways to garner income to support programs while aid from state and federal government entities are fast disappearing.

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Why Every Business Needs a Blog

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

It seems every day as I do my work for clients, I run into things to talk about on my blog. I recall a time when I thought how can I possibly blog – I only have enough time in the day to do work for my clients and get them on the fast track.

Well think again!

I am now realizing that a blog really is an enjoyable way to get to connect with your clientele – to help those that possibly have lost their way and just need a little swift kick in the pants (only kidding)!

Part of what makes my job so enjoyable is gladly sharing what I have learned through all my years in this business and seeing it make such a big difference to others. So this is a perfect venue for me!! And it should be for all of you who are serious about customer services and assisting with whatever is needed in your particular field.

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Is That Your Landing Page? No Thanks!

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

Are you as sick as I am seeing plain boring, frankly cookie cutter pages??

The ones that say get this for free! Then once you sign up, they open up another page and go on and on forever and ever until you get to your free item, trying to sell you everything but the kitchen sink?


So now you don’t know if you even want to get it free because they are just trying to trap you into oblivion…

Another thing, have you ever noticed that 99% of all landing pages look alike? They all look like cheap bill boards…

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Follow Your Passion

Comments (1) Boomer Life, Business, Entrepreneurs

You know. I think a lot of us get caught up in the rat race and don’t stop and really think about what makes us happy. Are you only out to make riches or are you truly following your heart desires? I heard a great saying. I am not sure who wrote it, but it is so true….

“Follow your passion and you will never work a day in your life.”

If you really love what you do – it will fulfill and motivate you. My hope is that this article will help you in evaluating your journey in business and in life. You really can have whatever you want in life – when you truly believe it and put action to it.

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Are You a Professional Student?

Comments (0) Business, Education, Entrepreneurs

Going through my emails today – tons and tons I might add. The thought came to me if I get bogged down in all the information coming into my inbox and stressed over what to save or what to throw away. How do you feel, overwhelmed, anxiety ridden?

Quite frankly, going through all the (junk) email is a big part of my job. Going through all my emails to find the gems – new resources and idea’s, that is why my clients pay me, to stay on top of revolving technologies and thing that work to explode their businesses.

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Do You Have a Personal Goal Contract?

Comments (1) Business, Education, Entrepreneurs

I have always felt that when we make a contract with ourselves that we have better success of achieving the goals we have set.  So take a look at this contract and read it and sign it and date it, as when complete you will have promised yourself that you would be doing these things and if you don’t do them then you will be disappointing yourself.  Also I find also that rather than writing down goals for 2011 if you would record them on a CD and play them in your car and listen to them everywhere you go, they will happen as they say if you hear something 21 days it gets impacted in your mind and automatically all those things happen, so why not make your personal goal for 2011, sign it and then record your individual goals and listen to them, it works a lot better than writing them down, as in the beginning we write them down and we perhaps read them for a few days and then the paper gets lost and that ends our ready of our goals and keeping them in front of us.  Try the CD version as I know you will see great results.


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They Say Time Heals All Wounds….

Comments (0) Boomer Life, Elder Care, Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

My life took a drastic turn in 2010. All my worries and fears came true – my dad passed away and less then 4 month later my mom was gone. They had been divorced for years and yet they passed so close together.

As baby boomers most of us are going through one of two stages: trying to help our aging parents or watching them slip through our fingers like sands in an hour glass, totally helpless to do anything to stop it.

As much as I loved my father, (and I was a daddies little girl) their is really nothing like a mother. She was my my cushion from the world. Anytime I had a disappointment or a set back she was my biggest supporter. It has been unbearable having to go on without her – We would talk every day sometimes twice a day.

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Your Business Success in 2011!

Comments (0) Business

Many businesses experience a decrease in customer interaction during the first weeks of the year. Embrace this opportunity. Take advantage of time with few or no distractions to accomplish projects, and prepare your business for high energy and productivity throughout the remainder of the year.

Organize, organize, organize: Clear the clutter from desk and counter tops and file the documents appropriately. File the stack of business cards you’ve been collecting, or better yet, input the information into an electronic format for easy transfer to e-newsletters, labels or phone databases.

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Traveling and Illness

Comments (0) Health, Travel

My father, who is being treated for esophageal cancer, recently took a trip from Washington State to New Mexico to visit his home. This was going to be like a vacation treat in between chemotherapy treatments, but the trip itself became a nightmare.

Due to the last minute nature of my father’s desperate plans to get himself out and on his own for a breather from his caregiver and situation, no-one could arrange to fly with him back to New Mexico. So my ill father began his journey on a flight from Wenatchee, WA to Roswell, NM carrying his own equipment for feedings through a tube in his stomach.

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Handling relationships with an ill loved one

Comments (0) Boomer Life, Elder Care

As I watch my siblings and I strive to handle the various situations that come up when a loved one is suffering from cancer and being treated with chemo and radiation therapy, I know there isn’t a single “right” way to handle the situation.  Even so, my father became keenly aware lately of the following:

It is very difficult to live in someone else’s home;
When one is dealing with their own illness, they like to have some sense of control of the choices in their life; and;
It’s very difficult to listen to someone else’s burdens or challenges when one is dealing with a life threatening challenge of one’s own.

At one point in the past few week’s my dad was ready to pull his hair out. In reality, he really was checking to see if his hair would pull out due to the chemo–he’s a bit paranoid about losing his hair and is full of anxiety about the possibility. But metaphorically speaking, he has been ready to pull his hair out from frustration at living in someone else’s home and feeling like he has not been given control over his own care and welfare.

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The Triple E Way to Holiday Entertaining

Comments (0) Business, Food and Drink, Home and Garden

Elegantly, efficiently, and economically …yes! There are two unalterable facts to consider: the holiday season is upon us and this miserable economy has hit our pocket books in a big way!

Whether you’re entertaining friends or business associates, you can do it at home. Forget pricey restaurants. That money is more wisely spent on other things. What you can also forget are the bags of chips, beer, and soda cans, paper plates, and plastic cutlery. These things are fine for the Fourth of July and birthday celebrations but certain holidays require bit more finesse.

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“Senior” is an Ageist Label

Comments (0) Boomer Life, Education

DownWithAgeismMINII belong to an online discussion group that’s currently debating the use of the word “senior” as in Senior Citizen and debating if this term, which has long been used, is acceptable and desirable to the people it encompasses.

My answer? NO!! This term, along with so many others, is a perfect example of ageism at its best. Any word that separates a group of people, labels them, differentiates them, and is discriminatory.

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What are the 5 Types of Men that Women Avoid and the 5 Types of Women that...

Comments (0) Boomer Life, Relationships/Marriage/Divorce


Women don’t think twice about brushing these kinds of guys off.

Men don’t give certain personalities a second thought.

Too often a day in the life of the dating world goes something like this: you meet someone, have a few conversations over the phone, go out once and then never see that person again.

Sound familiar? Chances are while you were on your date you discovered a personality that you know you just can’t deal with. It’s not that your date was creepy or malicious; you just know that a long-term relationship with that person won’t work out.

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Filing a business tax return

Comments (0) Business, Education, Entrepreneurs, Finance and Money

taxesThe income tax form that you will need to file for your business depends on the business entity that you established when you started your consulting practice. The business entities available for those starting a business are sole proprietorship, general or limited partnership, C corporation, S corporation, limited liability company (LLC), and limited liability partnership (LLP). Once you have determined the type of business entity you have, you can follow the IRS’ guidelines on how to report your business income and expenses.

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Don’t Forget to Include Sensuality and Pleasure in your New Year’s Resolutions. It’s GOOD for our health!

Comments (0) Boomer Life, Health, Menopause, Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

sexuality and sensualityWe all know the health benefits of going to a Fitness Center. We’ll even make sure to schedule time in our busy lives for exercise. Yet most of us are quicker to hit the gym before hitting the sheets when it comes to taking care of ourselves. However, taking time to self pleasure, or huffing and puffing your way through a sweat-inducing sex session may be far more beneficial to your overall health than the time you spend on the treadmill.

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Interview with Author Connie May Fowler: If this writing thing doesn’t work out, there’s always Le...

Comments (0) Food and Drink

Connie May Fowlerby Tamara Kaye Sellman

Connie May Fowler is the author of the soon-to-be-released novel, How Clarissa Burden Learned to Fly (April 2010) plus The Problem with Murmur Lee, Remembering Blue, When Katie Wakes: A Memoir, Before Women Had Wings, River of Hidden Dreams and Sugar Cage. She also served for two years as the author behind the food column, “Savoring Florida” and in her earlier years worked as a caterer and a bartender. She is the founder of Below Sea Level: Full Immersion Workshops for Serious Writers She reveals at her website that, “…if this writing thing doesn’t work out, she fancies herself attending Le Cordon Bleu culinary academy not in Atlanta, not in Miami, but in Paris.” Looks like the writing thing worked out after all, but maybe Ms. Fowler will still find a way to make her way overseas for some cooking lessons…

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Gluten Free Classics for Bakers

Comments (0) Food and Drink

goaheaditsglutenfree Tamara Kaye Sellman

One of the fastest growing areas of dietary concern focuses on food-related sensitivities that wreak havoc with our systems. Celiac disease (or sprue), is an autoimmune disease in which ingested glutens and other related proteins damage the small intestine’s lining. Gluten is the key protein in wheat flour, but it’s also found in barley, rye, and (potentially) oats.

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Sandra Levitin Interviewed on The Joy of Connecting – Making a Decision Without Retreating!

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

sandra_headshotI had the pleasure of being interviewed by Bonnie Ross-Parker, Founder of The Joy of Connecting.

Listen in as we talk about Making a Decision Without Retreating!

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Food Chat: Interview with Author Laura Kalpakian

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs, Food and Drink

“You take what’s on hand and apply to that a little imagination, a sense of timing, to make those ingredients yield what you want.”

by Tamara Kaye Sellman

Laura Kalpakian has received a National Endowment of the Arts, a Pushcart Prize, the Pacific Northwest Booksellers Association Award, and the first Anahid Literary Award for an American Writer of Armenian descent. Her novels include American Cookery, Steps and Exes, Graced Land, Caveat, and These Latter Days. Her short fiction has been gathered in three collections, including Fair Augusto, which won the PEN/West Award for Best Short Fiction.

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Vandals in the Palace – Living With Auto-Immune Disease

Comments (0) Addiction/Codependency, Health, Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

Currently, there are more than eighty illnesses identified and labeled ‘auto-immune disease’ in which the defensive mechanisms of the body turn on the body, itself. These range from over 20 million Americans stricken with Type 1 diabetes to an estimated 400,000 with multiple sclerosis to a few thousand per year in some of the more esoteric illnesses. Rheumatoid arthritis, systemic lupus; the list goes on and on. They can range from annoying to immediately life threatening and you have probably never heard of most of them. The truth is that whether you realize it or not, you know someone whose life and lifestyle are being manipulated by one of these diseases as you read this.

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Tom Brokaw – You Missed Something

Comments (0) Boomer Life

Originally published on March 26, 2010

tom-brokawA much publicized and anticipated two-hour documentary, “Tom Brokaw Reports: Boomer$!” aired on CNBC in early March.

I made a point to watch this venerable journalist recap my life as a boomer. And it was a great report, full of nostalgia of course, but also full of the realism that some boomers are facing today — downsizing with nowhere to go, healthcare costs for 72 million of us, conversation bites with boomers just like you and me and the problems we’re dealing with today.

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All You Have to Fear…is Making a Big Mess (and, maybe, treating war wounds later)

Comments (0) Food and Drink

by Tamara Kaye Sellman

pressure_cookerLast month I wrote about my purchase of a pressure cooker and my desire to make refried beans.

Of course, it hasn’t happened yet. Now I know why.

There are certain devices in my culinary arsenal that I generally don’t use, though my husband uses them. They include things that promise large blasts of heat or smoke or power-tool like effects: the gas grill, the Li’l Chief smoker, the salamander (that little blow torch you use for crème brulee), the pressure canner, and now, the pressure cooker.

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Women of excellence: be your amazing self

Comments (0) Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

Finding a good match for a mate (or even a date) seems to be a dilemma for many women—especially a woman over 40 who’s confident, focused, decisive, wise, independent, attractive and ambitious, and in many cases fearless. This combination can scare some men off. However, there are men who are seeking a woman of excellence with all of those qualities.

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Fighting Fair in 5 Easy Steps

Comments (0) Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

In the daily course of our lives disagreements are bound to arise and oftentimes they can erupt into violent arguments where our mouths become lethal weapons, injuring or even destroying a relationship.

You can choose to be reactive or proactive. If you choose to be reactive, you will most likely be on the defensive, stocking your arsenal of remarks that will never lead to a win-win situation.


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Secrets of Sales Success

Comments (0) Entrepreneurs

‘Making the Sale’ is the end result of what you and your business team do cumulatively.   Sales techniques are often defined by specific words or actions at the conclusion of a ‘sales’ dialogue.  When you consider all the aspects of your Company’s persona, you come to realize that the sum is indeed made up of many parts… Knowledge, Belief, Understanding, Promotion, Communication, the action of the Sale, and  Feedback.


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Flowers that Pop Up!

Comments (0) Crafts/Hobbies

Hi everyone!!! Today I want to share some layouts I did of the flowers on the Ranch. We so look forward to Spring to see all the different kinds of flowers that pop up. We never know what we will find and it seems every year is different.


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Are You Easily Distracted?

Comments (3) Business, Entrepreneurs, Health

This month, several of my life coaching clients are feeling overwhelmed by the abundance of distractions showing up in their lives,  and the limited amount of time available to participate in each experience.  Too many choices and “Shiny Lures” seem to be everywhere causing acute experiences of pleasure and pain.   These powerful women want to have it all,  but occasionally get lost in the land of potent distraction.  Here are some ways you can address the anxiety surrounding an attractive diversion, get clear about your choices, and move forward on the path of your choosing.


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No More Papers on Me

Comments (0) Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

I stared at the papers repeatedly, expecting to feel something different each time. They were signed, certified and official. They were legal documents that indicated I was officially free, so why did I feel… nothing?

My marriage had been over long before it officially ended. The covenant had been broken. The vows had been long forgotten. The promises had not been kept. After being separated for several years, in my heart, I was already divorced. All the papers did were to confirm my newly official status. I was now a divorcee. Divorced. Unmarried. The marriage was dissolved. I had moved from one statistical category to another within the split seconds that it took for the judge to sign and stamp them.


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Rachel Ray ~ Can You Top This?

Comments (0) Food and Drink, Home and Garden

This morning,after having my coffee and 2 bites of a muffin, I decided to do some meal preparation for the week.  As I applied myself to my usual multi-tasking procedure, I smiled to myself thinking,” I wonder what Rachel Ray would have to say about this?”


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Family Relationships – A Journey

Comments (0) Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

Relationships in family are important to most people on the planet. In my family, we tend to be independent, go our own way, live our own lives, but our parents still hold ties to each of us.  Other families tend to stay physically close and very involved in each other’s lives but ours didn’t work out that way.


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Wow! Showing Up Can Be So Awesome!

Comments (2) Business, Entrepreneurs

Just Ask

Last night I SHOWED up at a new Chamber Mixer, one that I had never been to. So I thought since it was being held at Guadalajara Restaurant in Lake Elsinore, CA and I had not been there, I thought I should SHOW UP and check it out.


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Do You Know How to Market Your Business?

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

There are so many people that just throw around the word marketing and really do not have a full grasp of what the word really means. Think about it – ask yourself, how do you define marketing? I read a book called “Mind Capture” by Tony Rubleski –in his book Tony states “Marketing is the oxygen of every successful business”. He is exactly right – I don’t care how great you product, service, or anything else is, if you do not market your business, then nobody will know about it – and if nobody know about your business do you really think you will be successful?


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Nature on the Ranch!

Comments (2) Crafts/Hobbies

Hi everyone, I’m so excited to be a guest blogger for Kalon.  I live on a ranch  in Texas and have the opportunity to take some awesome photos.   I love to use those unique photo’s in my art.  I find it is a way for me to share  the “ranch ” life with you city folk.



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Is Your Ego Holding You Back?

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

I must say – I really had to struggle with this one…

I have always been a person who prides themselves in listening to my clients. I also know I have a great eye for style and design (that is where the trouble comes in). Art is subjective and so not everyone will like everything someone designs or has designed.

That is just a reality.

As a professional designer – I tend to want my personal designs/websites etc. to lean toward the dramatic, that is something I enjoy designing as well as looking at – that is who I am.

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What Color is Your Business

Comments (0) Business, Education, Entrepreneurs

Color Affects Our Lives
Colors evoke emotions
Color communicates

Having been an artist long before I ever touched a computer I knew instinctively the power different colors had on my emotions. It wasn’t until (over a decade ago) when I decided to combined art with technology that I found out how powerful using the proper colors for you marketing collateral can be.

Studies show that shapes and colors affect people in different ways. Use them properly in your company logos, ad copy, and website and you’ll beat the competition.

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The Value of Social Media – In Business, In Life…

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

It’s a funny thing, when I first started hearing about web 2.0 it seemed like a foreign language, and now that I have stuck my toe into the river – I absolutely love it.

I have (finally!) figured out what social media sites work best for my business and I am still discovering great new ways to connect online.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am still learning and am yet to add some social bookmarking sites to my “tool box” when you are working with the internet you will be learning forever – nobody knows everything “Guaranteed”!

I have found that there is so much value in the connections you make with these networks, when you do it the “right way”.

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To Date or to Dine Alone

Comments (1) Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

What’s a newly divorced mom with two children to do when she finds herself alone on a Saturday night? The question is pressing if you’re over 40, looking to date and new to the dating scene after being married for a number of years. The whole idea of dating again might even feel intimidating. The fact is, there’s no golden rule that dictates when or even if you should date. But if you do decide to get back out there and explore the dating game, make sure you’re spending your time the way YOU want to spend it. In other words, remember that your time is valuable.


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Online Dating over 40

Comments (0) Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

After the death of my husband over 2 years ago I finally re-entered the dating world after 18 years of being away from it.  Now in my 40’s I wasn’t sure about what to expect.  Would men still find me attractive? (I am the mother of twin boys now – stretch marks and all.)  Would I remember what to do on a first date? Where do you go on a first date? What was I really looking for in a date?

At the prompting of one of my best friends I began by trying online dating.  My friend knows I live online and thought it would be a great way to begin the process.  She was right. I created a really nice profile about who I was and the things I liked on a popular dating website.  I focused on being positive and projecting an upbeat image.  I read some of the suggestions about what type of photo to post and then I took a picture of myself with the camera on my laptop.  I had fun with it and I was laughing in most of my photos. I put up my photos and prepared to wait.

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One of Life’s Saddest Truths

Comments (2) Boomer Life, Relationships/Marriage/Divorce

If we live long enough we will all lose a parent – and though it is inevitable it doesn’t take the sting out. I recently lost my father and though he was sick for a while I always knew he was there sitting in his easy chair or tinkering in the basement on his latest invention.

The loneliness and heartache of it all is truly breathtaking – and I have had to step back from my business a bit because honestly, it puts everything into perspective. All the success in the world will not replace my dad – and so it goes, he was proud of me and through his struggles of alcoholism (he had been sober for the last 25 yrs) and life’s great challenges he was always “my daddy”.

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7 Crucial Steps to Creating a Prosperous Business

Comments (0) Business, Entrepreneurs

1. Hire experts to do what you are not good at! If you are an expert in your field and really good at what you do – why waste your time trying to figure out how to do things you

a. Don’t know… b. Are not good at… c. Don’t have time for…

For example, I love designing websites and marketing materials, as an artist, I just love it. I happened to be born with an artistic gene, I am an expert at designing and developing websites that are marketing machines. I have been in this industry for over a decade. I have experience so I am a great consultant. I can draw up marketing plans like nobodies business, but…

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Are you adding some FUN to your life?

Comments (4) Business

I don’t know about YOU but I am a type A personality, which means that before I started to add FUN to my life I worked Day and Night. I was the person that did say I was going to block time for ME and then someone would come along and need my help and the next think I knew my time was gone.

In the last year many of my NAFE members have been diagnosed with Cancer and other things, and many were YOUNG and it got me thinking that if I did not take time for ME than I probably would not be around to do the work that I love, and that is help others, as that is my passion, to help YOU soar to greatness.

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Why is social media important in business?

Comments (0) Business

Social media provides virtually instant access to information throughout the world, thus giving businesses the ability to share news about their products and services with people that were once out of reach. Social media is easily one of the fastest growing (free) benefits of technology today. Not very long ago, businesses were limited to connections with contacts within their neighborhood or at best, their country. The door is now open to share your business with the world.


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Am I Going Crazy?

Comments (2) Menopause

Menopause Mania

“Sandy, I just feel so out of it – discombobulated – like I’m not myself and I really think there is something wrong with me. Sometimes, I think I’m going crazy – and my husband agrees with me,” my dear friend Mary Ellen said to me over the phone one morning. “I feel guilty because all I do is whine to my family and friends about it. None of them want to hear me whine, and they don’t understand or know how to help me.” I could tell that she was almost in a state of panic because of how she was feeling – but more so – because she couldn’t understand why she was feeling this way.

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